So irritating. My DH is passive and hates conflict. We have been together 3 years, I have two girls 13 and 14. He has 3 kids, one lives with us and is unemployed, smokes pot, and I personally believe he is manic depressive. DH was cheated on twice by ex wife after 23 years he left. He met me, and wouldn't you know I like that he is not an arguer. Part of the problem, I suppose.

His son constantly critizizes my girls, complains when they leave something out, and if they have an attitude he goes running to tell daddy. his goal, I believe is to get all three of us out. Then life would be perfect for him, alone all day with no job and all the pot he wants to smoke since he can use his unemployment check for anything he wants. He pays no rent, his dad BOUGHT him ANOTHER car after he blew the engine in the first one....but he complains he cannot afford to get insurance.

Today, he sniped at my 13 year old (who does speak with attitude a lot of the time) about cat food and her wanting the dog coming into the house only because he was putting the cat food on the floor. I calmly mentioned to DH about the sniping, and he said he heard a different story and how my DD was copping an attitude and getting all snotty with SS....and that he is tired of the back and forth.

I am so irritated that he NEVER believes his son may be the one with attitude, it is ALWAYS my DDs. (I don't use never and always lightly).
DH at times is annoyed with SS but won't actually say anything to him. Like get a job, pay rent, get out, be respectful, turn the music down, stop moving my stuff, quit complaining about every little noise....nothing.

Then DH complains to ME about his behavior...I told him to complain to the person he is mad at not me. I am tired of listening to the same complaint and not seeing any effort to change the situation.

When DH complains about my kids, I see to it that behaviors are addressed and changed. I suppose he thinks complaining to ME will somehow seep into his son's head and he will start to see clearly he must get a job. He will NEVER move out, consistently takes anything out of the living room he rarely steps into and tosses it onto my girls' floor....moves MY things so I can't find stuff, rearranges his dad's garage things, and then has the gall to complain.

I am irritated, but unwilling to be the one to leave. I am stubborn, and don't want to break up with DH, because I love him. now my girls see him as an A-Hole because he won't stand up to his son when they are clearly right.

I am frustrated. If it were up to me (it is not my house, it was passed to DH from his father) SS's crap would be out on the street yesterday. Locks changed. you get the picture. DH says, just wait until yours are older...I said, yes, just wait. they will either go to school or have a job and will contribute or they are out at 18. They know this too. No slackers allowed.

history: his daughter was13 when I met her, he was cutting her meat, I put my foot down and said, no she can do that. i taught her to do dishes, laundry, clean her own room and to take care of her dog's messes and cage....so she moved in with mommy because mommy will do all of that for her. I accidentally read a text from mommy (we had the same cell at the time) and it said...I cleaned your room, honey, do you want to come visit? ....are you kidding???