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The Divorce Is still strong

Journey123's picture

If I repeat myself please forgive me...Have had alot of stress. I want the divorce but have a feeling I hired the wrong lawyer. Have already paid them  and dont really have enough to hire another Lawyer. My lawyer told me the other day that it was very nice of my soon to be ex to have placed me on the deeds to 2 of the propertys. I thought about what she had said and wanted to tell her off and remind her that she is my lawyer not his. But didnt want her charging me extra.My daughter and my grandkids are not talking to me anymore I guess its because he has money and you can buy things and people. I told them if they were in an abusive relationship I wouldnt expect them to stay in it. But if they did feel free to hook up. My 1 grandaughter who is 21 said I have been acting mean. I have been short yes.My soon to be ex has been up here 6 times now taking them out to dinner and doing family photos and putting them on facebook. This bothers me because I know how he works . He is going to kiss up to have them on his side tell this is all over and once its done they will not exist to him.I found out that where I live is a know fault state. (what a joke)......So all of the mental abuse I have put up with for 11 1/2 years doesnt matter. I also found out when I went to the lawyer that the taxes say he only makes 12 thousand a year which is a lie.I would do the taxes and send them to him like I have done every years because he has to see them. I'm thinking he changed them before he sent them to the tax guy to finish them up. But I guess it doesnt matter because the lawyer said he owned the bussiness before we got married. now he is telling my lawyer for the 3rd time that he needs the check book to do the taxes my daughter and granddaughter took all that stuff to him a few months ago. so thinking he is going to lie again on the taxes. I told my lawyer and she told me in order for anyone to check them for the years it would cost me about 10 grand I dont have that kind of money. m so tired of all this and I feel so alone alot of the times.His adult kids also had alot to do with me saying ok to the divorce. I can actually say i have never disliked all his adult kids like I do. Alot of my soon to be ex,s friends have heard I;m getting divorced and have said to me we dont understand why you stayed in it so long. I said because I beleive in Marriage. But I got to the point where I want to be happy and to laugh again. But so far have been really sad and depressed because I,m scared, I have gone to the womans shelt talking to them but not much help all the say is uh huh. I'm sorry this was so long I get on here when I get the time.

 

notsurehowtodeal's picture

Are you sure your lawyer didn't mean that it was nice he put your name on the deeds because now you can claim part of the property in the divorce settlement? Even if she said something nice about him it doesn't mean she isn't going to fight for you. Be up front with her and ask her what she meant. You don't need to tell her off, just talk to her about it.

Your lawyer was probably talking about a forensic audit of the business which is very expensive. It would only be worth it if you had some assurance you would make the money back in the settlement.

I'm sorry your daughter and granddaughters are not being supportive. Do you have any other family or friends that you can connect with who might be able to provide some support?

tog redux's picture

Yeah, what the poster said above is what the attorney meant. He gave you some property that is now part yours. Attorneys want clients, why would she look down on you for divorcing?

Get a good therapist, this guy is messing with your head.  Do the best you can to settle this all quickly even if it doesn't seem "fair". You don't have kids, so all you have to lose is money and money isn't worth your sanity. All these games he has been and is playing are abusive and designed to tear you down (manipulating your kids, etc).

STaround's picture

Sorry I am having trouble undeerstanding all this, but you do not have to sign a joint tax return.  If you think he is cheating on taxes, just do not sign. File your own marired filing seperate return.