invisible
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we had sd over at our house for a small family gathering. some of dh adult family friends we attending.
sd who lives out of town wanted to face time with the family so i overheard sd talking to her sister. i thought it would be nice to say hello at least to the out of town sd.
sd with the phone walks right past me and over to the family friends so they can talk to other sd.
thoroughly rude at not even giving me the chance to say hello.
this only further solidifies my opinion of the sd. i am so glad i am disengaged.
pffft she's ignoring you,
pffft she's ignoring you, next time ignore her and do not invite her }:)
This is just rude, bullying
This is just rude, bullying behavior typical of jealous SD's. If you are the target of her treating you like this on a regular basis, it is time to stay away from it. The behavior will only escalate to direct insults, if you are ignoring effectively. There is no need in you being around people who treat you like this, regardless of whom they are in your life.
OP stated she's disengaged.
OP stated she's disengaged. Why would the SD think disengaged SM (who, by the way, if not disengaged could pick up the phone and call/facetime any time OP pleased) would want to talk?
Nothing rude nor bullying behavior to offer the visiting family friends to talk first. It would be rude/bullish to just shove the phone at disengaged SM and put SM on the spot.
I don't think one can expect someone else to instinctively know when one desires to briefly reengage.
thank you for understanding.
thank you for understanding. yes i am disengaged from all of the bigger issues, but does not mean i dont want to give a polite hello to the other sd.
Well, hello....yes, it is
Well, hello....yes, it is reasonable to expect to be treated kindly and reasonably included by anybody you are around. If you are feeling left out, you are likely correct. Stay completely away from people who treat you like this....
Bullying includes
Bullying includes intentionally excluding a person, in order to exert power. I am not certain that was the case here, only the OP knows specifically; but if that were the case, it clearly meets the definition of bullying.
You are disengaged, you
You are disengaged, you didn't ask to say hello. This is a non-issue.
thank you.
thank you.
when someone is offering a
when someone is offering a plate of food at a party, you offer the plate to everyone. its just manners.
you dont pass over someone saying "oh i hear you dont like cheese" and walk around them. you offer the plate anyway and say "oh these are cheese snacks. would you like one anyway?"
again its just politeness. sd was rude.
SugarSpice.... you are
SugarSpice.... you are forgetting one thing lady - just because you got raised with manners does not mean your brat SD has any lol...... and quit frankly it's way too late to teach that brat anything....
she's ignoring you on purpose cause she's a brat, you know this, I know this from reading your posts... simply ignore the little twat, I would be very evil after she talked to the nice SD and hung up, I would've called and said - Oh just wanted to say Hi how are you... your sister ignored my request and she's her usual brat self }:)
karma is the best remedy.
karma is the best remedy.
the little brat just got dumped by her boyfriend. the young man lost interest in her because she threw herself at him from the start and started playing house. sex home cooking? what does a young man have to work for? the challenge was not there. bm did not tell sd that a young man must work for a young womans affections and she have a little pride in herself. i am not about to give her some wisdom about being a young woman. too late for that. let her learn the hard way while i stand back and laugh to myself.
One thing I regret in my 20
One thing I regret in my 20 year relationship with SD was that when she was rude, I just smiled and let it go. In retrospect, I should have taken care of it at the first sign of rudeness. Skids should know in the very beginning that you will not tolerate rudeness.
dh totally forgot his balls
dh totally forgot his balls around his children and now they are all entitles spoiled adults. let them reap the rewards of their rude and cruel behavior.
I so agree with you
I so agree with you sandye21
For years I also did nothing when my sd's, and DH's sister, were rude and bullying to me
Now, I tend to just ignore a lot from them except, when they pull their obvious bullying rude behavior towards me. I just don't tolerate it any longer. I WILL say something. And funny, they tend to back down then, or try to justify or better worded EXCUSE, their own behavior
Bully's are cowards. When they see someone is going to take them on directly and without any fear, they generally back right down like the quivering wimps that they are
I see no need to say hello to
I see no need to say hello to people you know are going to treat you badly. People that have always treated you rudely and usually ignore you. If you make the decision to see these people at all, perhaps just talking with the people who choose to hang out with you would be best. One of the things I used to do (for the last 10 years, we tried the holiday at grandma's but things weren't the same after she died and now, I'm coming around to the belief that we don't actually have to celebrate holidays with mean people so this year, I'm splitting up the holiday to spend more time with my side of family instead of enduring another night of hell) was bring a puzzle. Usually there are people who are more introverted or want a distraction and it was fun to do this while all the drama swirled around me. Other years, it was a game, calling distant relatives, getting the ice or other errands--things besides the full meal preparation which I did for many years and eventually tired of the lack of gratitude or reciprocation. Fully agree you have to call people on their BS. Because most of the time, hubby won't hear or see the problem (often timed exactly that way) and if you won't stand up for yourself, how can you expect others to? The last time I had to deal with SD, she ignored me because she knows I won't put up with her BS. At Thanksgiving, SS threw his comment my direction but my little boy was right there and it went right over his head so I kept my cool, told my husband about it later and promptly made other holiday plans. I firmly believe life is too short for this BS.