Recap:

Married to DH for over a year. YSD lived with us over a year ago, daddy gave her “spousal status” (oh yea tension in the house between me her and her father)....BM was “virtually in bed” with us (having her hand in our marriage/life too much), calling DH every few days to give him updates on the personals going on with both adult SD’s (18 & 20 at the time, and the oldest lived with BM). DH finally tells BM two years ago to stop calling all the time, so she FLIPPED OUT, and also the SHF with his SIL who we’ve come to find out after hating BM through the divorce, was now actually in bed with her and the two step-brats during all our drama, and we were being targeted and me the “stepmonster”. Things escalated 6-7 months after cutting off the BM (thanks to our darling princesses and the tails they spun to BM & SIL) and me and the YSD had a confrontation last summer and I kicked her out. DH’s brothers and their wives took on the MOB MENTALITY and it was an all out WAR against us, with the BM and the SIL as their ring-leader, and the SD’s in tow.

DH had a talk with his brothers last fall, and it didn’t go so well. Basically telling them to butt out of our business and what happens in our house, and they came back with all sorts of bits and pieces of “attack material” against me……such as the one brother brought up we were sleeping together before I actually got my divorce. Big whoop. But, as we all know on the boards here, if those little darlings so much as whine about their evil SM, the entire family forms a full blown frontal attack. We were not invited to Christmas last year, and basically his brothers and SIL’s said DH is never allowed in their houses again.

So, fast forward to the present. DH went to his dad’s big b-day (70th) party a month ago (I decided not to go, for not risking another frontal attack I could not be prepared for, AND not knowing if his darling princesses might be there……..I just didn’t need any surprises, so I stayed home). Anyway, all three brothers (DH) got along great, played cards all night, etc. It went really well. The toxic SIL and the other SIL kept to themselves and left the party early. Not much of the other family (that like me and we all hang out (Uncles/Aunts/Cousins) had not much to say to either one of them.

So we had a poker party this past weekend and DH invited his brothers (which I thought was a great idea, even though, as much crap that they’ve tried to dig up on me has made me have ZERO RESPECT for either one of them, especially attacking my DH with such a Junior High mentality when they all met last fall). So they came. And I was prepared. I was friendly, but not too friendly. I didn’t engage in too much conversation, but briefly chatted over work etc. Nothing trivial. I wanted to keep somewhat of a distance and I didn’t want to make them think I welcome them back with warm loving open arms. I wanted to be polite and go about my evening with the other ladies (wives) that were there.

I got a kick out of both brothers. They could hardly look me in the eye, I could tell they were SOOO EMBARRASSED about how they conducted themselves and what they said about me last year to my DH. I was almost enjoying taking the high road and making sure they knew it (in a subtle way).

So, I was on the fence about going to DH’s aunt’s for Thanksgiving because those evil SIL’s will be there, but with both of these events going smoothly with his brothers, seems it’s down to two adults (SIL’s) who will be all alone at family gatherings, until they want to put on big girl panties and treat me decent.

And trust me, I’m not horribly overjoyed about being back in with the toxic personalities, but I’m doing it for my DH, because they mean more to him than they do to me. And, like all of us here who complain so much about how the other side of the family treats us, it does take some of the tension away. I'm just grateful it's now down to only two toxic family members (well, not including the BM and SD's), but the SD relationship is something DH will have to repair over time---if at all.