Making Peace with ungrateful BM
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I'm married and have a SS7. I am his mom full-time... Except on Mother's Day and for bragging rights. His manners, politeness, and cleanliness - all me.
I've been beyond annoyed with the BM who really only wants to be friends with her oldest - she has two other kids, 6 & 1. She only has these kids because she got back with her ex-husband.
She expects me to take care of her child, but is so ungrateful. My DH denied her access to SS for a year and her whole family thinks it was all my doing. I wish BM would freakin realize I have no obligations, I have no rights either.
Anywho, just wanting advice on how to make peace within myself for my own sanity.
You have to just let it go.
You have to just let it go. I've been the only stability my two youngest step kids ever had and their Mom is the same. Bragging rights and mother's day. She doesn't want to do without something to help pay for braces, but boy she likes the attention of bieng a mom. She doesn't do dr appts, school meetings, lunch money, clothes, medicine, etc., but she does haul them to her N/A meetings to show them off.
BM's often take the SP's for
BM's often take the SP's for graunate..
I know BM here sits on FB and tags herself in EVERYTHING I post weather it be photos of the kids on there grandparents pages or there Fathers!
She's good at barking orders but never follows them herself.
Dont beat yourself up. You are raising and accepting children that arent yours... Your doing one thing better then BM is doing.
Another topic that I can
Another topic that I can totally relate to. I am SS13's mom 26 days of the month. I send him to private school, cook his meals, teach him manners, provide him with medical, dental and vision, take him to the doctor's, make sure he gets to counselling, speak with his teachers, fill out his permission slips - you know, everything a mom does!
When BM found out (in court. the same court session where she lied and said she slept with DH on Christmas right in front of me in an effort to piss me off - HUGE LIE, but I digress) that we would be sending SS13 to private school. So she sends me a card that says,
"Thanks for sending SS13 to private school. Can you also look into medical and dental for him?"
seriously, she thrashes DH's vehicles, then she's saying they're sleeping together (during the one hour he allowed her over to see SS on Christmas eve day), then she's thanking me, then she's asking for more... no shame!
You guys have the same
You guys have the same situation as me. Good to know I'm not the only one.
Thank you for sharing.
How were you able to let it go?
I have this situation. BM is
I have this situation.
BM is useless, but of course she is "mom". I actually had conversations with BM about the fact that DH is a GROWN MAN, who makes his own decisions. There is nothing I can do or say to FORCE him in to acting a certain way or taking certain actions with SS. I am mearly a spectator when it comes down to it.
Sometimes she gets it, sometimes she doesn't. I have learned to not really care WHAT she thinks about how things go down in our house. It's none of her buisness.