The Ex changed her name back!
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Ok, so my husband's ex wife had remarried shortly after they got divored. She took her new husbands last name. They had been married for 6 years and just got divorced. I just found out that she changed her name back to her married name (the same last name as her kids and now my last name), instead of her maiden name.
This really infuriates me! Anybody else have this issue? Does it bother anyone else like it does me? I feel like I don't even have a right to the name. It was her name first...But why??? Why would she change it back to my husband's name???
I know exactly how you
I know exactly how you feel!
Her reasoning is that it should be the same name as the kids. DH retaliated that if she really felt that way she would never have changed her name when she got married the second time!!!
She still has his name.
How to get over it?
Try to rise above and realize a name is nothing ... BUT IT IS REALLY FRICKING HARD!
Yeah...it bugs me a lot. BM
Yeah...it bugs me a lot. BM never even changed her name legally when she was married for less than a year to DF. But yet she continues to use it and told DF that it is her legal name even though when she submits her payroll and tax info for child support, she uses her maiden name.
Our irony is that BM didn't
Our irony is that BM didn't want to take DH's name when they married--pseudo feminist flavor of the month thing. He insisted. But she kept his after the divorce--and the kids were 14 and 18. And what's the big deal about "having the same name as the kids" at that age?
I hate that BM has not
I hate that BM has not changed her name from DH's, despite their divorce and her marrying someone else. I don't let her know it bugs me though. One day I will say something about her sham marriage, and throw up the name thing...
Yeah I am of the thought that
Yeah I am of the thought that if you get married at take the man's name, then when you get divorced you should change it back to maiden name. Yes, the kids will have different names but that's what freakin happens when you get divorced! They will have a lot of things that are different from BM, that's just reality....
But with this she can't even use the excuse that she wanted to have the same last name as kids because she changed it when she re-married. Sooo that really is disturbing. I would be pissed as well, but unfortunately not really anything you can do to change it
And, guess what if she has a daughter and she grows up and gets married they will have different names anyways soooo what's the point?
Hmmm that is interesting but
Hmmm that is interesting but I still see it as no useful reason that she kept his married name. So she did all the things that a wife may do for her husband, but he isn't her husband anymore. I guess I don't see the point in trying to desperately to cling to your past. But to each their own you know?
That's ridiculous!Sounds like
That's ridiculous!Sounds like she might still have a thing for him. Let go already!
Yeah, the changing it for the
Yeah, the changing it for the kids thing is really BS. She's the one who left my husband, left her kids, ran off, got married, and changed her name to her new husband's name. So now that that didn't work out, she wants to pretend like it all never happened? It's driving me crazy! I really want to change my name back to my maiden name. It just doesn't mean anything to me to have my husband's name anymore.
Don't let it drive you crazy!
Don't let it drive you crazy! She's the wack job and it's obvious. Try to laugh at her.
I should note that she had
I should note that she had been remarried for 6 years and thus had a different last name than her kids for 6 years. The kids are all teenagers now. So for 6 years, she didn't care about having a different last name than her kids. I think she just has malicious motives for doing it now. Maybe because DH and I have moved on and have two babies together. She's just trying to be hurtful.
She's just hanging on to
She's just hanging on to whatever she can... don't let her know it bothers you. That's the best payback you can give her.
I'll be short here: My mom
I'll be short here: My mom kept her married name after the divorce when I was 6 years old, for me...
Fast FWD to my 1st marriage and my name was obviously changed and I recall mom saying, "I should have gone back to my maiden name."
I have a BD20 and we did not have that same last name as I did not marry her dad nor want a dime from him. She had the last name- I did not. She was also adopted by my 1st husband at age 3 years. (who was 16 years older than me) BD20 has had two name changes thus far in her life...(now, her "real" dad- step dad- has been passed away for 4 years now-sad.)
Now, remarried 2nd time after widowed very young,again, not the same last names and I also have another "Mrs. DH" within a mile of me as well who I am pretty sure is on her way to getting remarried very soon. BM insisted on keeping DH's last name for the child but does not seem to care about keeping it any longer for SD6 and obvious stated reasons.
Names are petty in my book. Whatever. I've had a "few." If anything were to happen with DH and I though, I would go back to my maiden name in a NY minute. No thanks.