Hello everyone, I am new to this site but let me just say THANK GOD I found it! It is such a relief to have found something where people actually understand what i'm going through and won't be judged for it. Sooooo many things to vent about, but will try to keep it short. I've been married to DH for almost 2 years, together for 4 years before that, and friends for 2 years before that as well. He has a 6 y/o daughter from a previous relationship. I've never really beleived in step parenting/ step child roles, and have never assumed one with her. DH was dating BM for a couple months, they broke up, then found out she was pregnant. He made it very clear to her that he did not want a child with her. Now this woman slept around to the point where she didn't even know if he was the father or not. Soooo, she had the kid anyhow and turned out he was the father. (SD was 1 year old when I first met DH and we became friends).

So, I did try in the beginning, I really did. Then I just dealt with so much B.S. and drama in regards to the BM AND the SD that I just gave up. The only reason I ever tried in the first place to be decent was to try to make DH happy. Then I came to the realization that no, I didn't deserve all the crap that was coming my way being involved and I was going to put my happiness before SD. Ever since, it's been better, but still no picnic.

DH sees his daughter every other weekend out at his Mother's house which is almost an hour away. This kills two birds with one stone: he visits with his mother and his kid at the same time. I end up going out with him for visits ONLY to see his mother, but I hate the fact that his kid is there. I really just can't stand her. She is such a brat, she throws tantrums and whines and cries until she gets what she wants. She will be 7 in a few months and acts like she's 3. She knows just what to do to manipulate her father to get what she wants and he falls for it. He'll use the excuse "she's only 6" or "she is just tired and needs a nap" or "she hasn't been feeling well". Which is all crap. This kid is such a sneak. And soooo rude. If the attention isn't on her the whole time we are visiting, she will start screaming and yelling and interuppting conversations. She insists on sitting between me and DH during dinnertime, and if I try to give him any sort of affection, she flies right in the middle and tries to jump all over him for attention. Even if we visit his mother and other family when SD isnt there, that's ALL they talk about....how she did this, and did that, and the BM took her here, and took her there, and look at all these pics aren't they adorable? and she is such a perfect angel....YEAH RIGHT! come on people.......Never once do they ever talk about how things are going with DH and I.

UGH...I am so beyond sick of this kid....I just sit here every day and think about how perfect things would be without her....I hate hearing her name, I seeing her face, I hate listening to her talk....I resent the fact that DH insisted that she be in the wedding, even though he knew I did NOT want her to be a part of it.

I am starting to get really resentful towards DH in regards to the situation. It's really making me angry that every time I go to his mother's with him, he comments on how he wants his kid to turn out like me, and wants me to show her what a healthy relationship looks like. Excuse me, not my responsibility. It's not my fault that her BM is a loser who got knocked up so young. I'm sorry, but I've been on birth control for 9 years and it's never come close to failing once.

I'm also very resentful that this kid has his last name. They were only together for a couple months! I mean, he was not married to this woman, they had to do a paternity test to see if she was even his, why in the world would she have his last name? And he's all proud as plum about it too....He's like well it's my kid, why wouldn't she have my last name? Uhmmm, duh. it's just gross....I used to feel bad about being so bitter about the situation, but I just can't keep it in anymore, it's driving me nuts. I feel like pulling away more and more so I can deal with it less...