Let me start off by saying that I enjoy having a house full of children. Allow me to rephrase that...a house full of well behaved normal children.
My boyfriend has three children, daughter (14), we'll call her Paris Hilton, another daughter (8), we'll call her Pigtails, and a son (6), we'll call him Godzilla.
Paris doesn't like to come to Dad's house because he won't allow her to bring friends. She was at his house yesterday for the first time in one year, almost to the day. Pigtails is normally a very sweet little girl when I am around, but for some reason, she had been a complete bear according to her father. Godzilla is just that. When he comes into a room, buildings begin to fall and terror abounds.
Paris thinks the world revolves around her. There is nothing that she doesn't have because she gets anything she wants from her mother. Her mother does not have any money. Everything she purchases is paid for with a credit card to which she does not intend on making payments. We know this because my boyfriend gets calls on occasion regarding her credit card balances and also gets something in the mail about every week stating that this balance needs to be paid or blah, blah, blah. When they were married, she ran up multiple credit cards to a total of (deep breath..) over $58,000. The credit cards were opened in both of their names, however, she had the statements mailed to one of her pill head friends house so he wouldn't know the cards existed. Yes, that's right, she is addicted to pain medications and has custody of the children (whole other story...sigh). That is basically the entire credit card debt, online pain pill purchases, high end clothing and fast food.
Paris showed up yesterday carrying a Dooney & Bourke bag that was bigger than a duffel bag. I acted like I liked it and asked her where she got it and she replied "Macy's". Wow... Then I noticed that she had a pair of Ed Hardy flip flops on. Those run anywhere from $30-$60 and the Dooney bag had to be at least $245. Paris told her Dad that there was a new song that she really like and he "needed" to buy her the CD tomorrow. Quote "You need to buy me this CD because I have to have it and you have to buy it for me. We can go to the mall tomorrow and you can do that for me" My boyfriend was like, "no I'm not and I don't know why you think you deserve it". Then she goes into a whiney pout about how he never buys her anything. He replied with the whole "money can't buy love" speech, which didn't work with her.
Okay, now Pigtails goes into WhineFest 2010 because she is "cold". We just got out of the pool and told them to all go change into their dry clothes. Pigtails refused to change clothes and continued to wear her bathing suit. Therefore, the reason she was cold later in the evening. She came to me and in a whiney voice, "told" me to go into the house and get her clothes for her. I told her that she could go get them herself. She continued to whine and I firmly held my ground. After a few minutes, she went into the house and did it on her own. Dad was amazed at my persistence. He looks to me for parental guidance because he has admitted to being lost in that department.
Now to Godzilla...He gets upset because his mother didn't bring him the ten Star Wars characters that he requested over the telephone. She was supposed to stop by Wal Mart and buy them when she brought Paris up that evening. (Paris was a day late because she originally didn't want to come). She promised him these toys if he would go with his Dad for two days. Why does she need to promise him a gift for spending time with his father? And not just one toy...10 of them. Why ten? Because he doesn't have them and he needs to have everything from the toy section at Wal Mart. When the mom shows up with Paris and doesn't have the requested toys, he throws a FIT!
Why do these kids think they a owed everything? Its like they have to have everything or they will die.
What are we supposed to do about this? He only gets a few days a month with them, so its not like we can correct the behavior in that short period. I told my boyfriend to stand his ground by continuing to tell them "no" when they put in multiple requests for their "wants". But they keep whining about everything. It drives us nuts! Last night, my boyfriend went in the house to take a Xanax because he just had enough and was about to flip his lid. I was like, I'm going home and he walked me and my son to my car, gave me a kiss and told me how jealous he was that I got to go home away from his kids. It's pretty sad when he said "I can't wait for them to leave tomorrow". Even his mother said that she was exhausted from listening to them whine and talk about all their "stuff". She said "she is ruining these kids", talking about their mother. And I truly believe she is ruining them and my boyfriend can't really do anything about it. HELP!!!