Looking after someone else's children (unpaid) is the epitome of selflessness

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I've come to the conclusion that taking care of someone else's children for a considerable number of hours every week, without being paid for it, is one of the most selfless acts one can do.

For all the step dads out there - this is your good deed, a proud accomplishment, and you know it's more than most men could handle or would put up with. Consider yourself officially unselfish. People may call you many things, but selfish won't be one of them.

Whenever you feel stressed or like running to your cave, just consider that this is your way of giving something back. The children you help to raise will benefit immeasurably from your efforts.

Every meal you cook, every school run you make, every moment you play with them, every piece of advice or discipline - you are giving them an amazing gift that cannot be undone.

They may not openly thank you for it until they are all grown up (and maybe not even then), but you will know deep down that you made a difference. You were there when their bio father (and mother in some cases) wasn't. Think about it.

You are a part of creating their childhood memories and shaping their future. If a man's pride lies in his creations, then feel pride over this.

I can do that. I am proud of

I can do that. I am proud of the young man I raised as my son in partnership with his mom.

It was my pleasure. Intermittently frustrating, occassionally infuriating, but my pleasure none the less.

When my brother married a

When my brother married a woman with 2 small children (6 and 4 I think) some of his friends said "Bummer that she has kids". My brother's response was that he considered those children to be a positive as he adored them.

He and their mother divorced years later, but he is still extremely close to both of his ex-steps who are now grown (30s).

Not all step relationships are toxic. Most of what we see here are not good - because that's what this site is for - to vent (b*tch) about the bad situations.

Dupe.

My philosophy on Skids,

My philosophy on Skids, particularly mine, is that he is part of the experience that makes my bride who she is. If she had not had him she would not be who she is and who she is is the woman who earned my heart 22+ years ago and the woman she has become has earned my heart every day since.

I think that if an adult does not like the behaviors that a Skid exhibits that adult has a choice. Engage and influence the kid to make better decisions or .... be miserable.

To me life is not about misery... except for those who refuse to abandon unacceptable behavior. Then it is up to those of us who are exposed to those behaviors to make the perpetrators of those behviors miserable. And have some fun while doing it. }:)

It matters not who those toxic people are.

This post is a nice idea, but

This post is a nice idea, but color me as one of the "disaffected majority." I have been a step-father for going on 20 years, and it has been nothing but a pain in the ass. It is, however, nice to see someone say something complimentary about me, even if in the general sense of this post, b/c my DW sure doesn't think much of my contributions over the years.

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