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I've always said if I were to have my own kids (unlikely) I'd want girls.

My partner's daughter is nearly 14. I find her adorable. She is at that age where she likes to pretend she's all grown up, but in many ways she is still very dependent. So that kind of dilemma is quite funny and endearing to watch. She is mature for her age (more mature than her bio dad that's for sure), intelligent, kind, but she is also quite girly.

If I were her dad I would probably spoil her rotten and be overly protective, so it's a good job I'm not!

The boys, however, not so cute. I'm civil towards them and try not to show any favouritism.

I just don't like boys very much. They take longer to mature, they're smellier, more boisterous, more aggressive, they walk around in their pants, they don't brush their teeth, they pee on the toilet seat and don't wipe their arse properly. They squabble and fight and are constantly trying to outdo and undermine each other, but in an unproductive and tedious kind of way.

Yes, I was a boy not so long back (I'm only 33). Maybe that's the problem - I know what we're like. I've done the whole boy thing and it's all very predictable to me. It's only when we properly grow up (I'd say... hmmm... age 25?) that we start to become respectable.

OK, I am generalising here, I know. I just think cuteness plays a large role in how much you can tolerate someone. Like a kitten that craps on the carpet instead of the litter tray... you just can't get mad at it. Girls are cute right through to adulthood. Boys are just... boys.

Good thing you don't have a

Good thing you don't have a daughter, because sounds like you would raise her to be a daddys girl. Daddys girl are not the nicest, sweetest things. In fact they can be down right selfish, entitled, and expect the world to cater to them. Other than being great daughters to daddy, they cannot maintain friends (too selfish), and make lousy GF or wives (again too selfish). They become competitive with their mothers, SM"s or anyone in their dads life. Again a generalization and purely IMO and experience.
I have boys, who are menches (decent kind men), who were not coddled and made to work hard, study, learn to be kind, yet know to get what they want without hurting others a long the way. If I had a daughter, I would have raised her the same way.
I think daughters can be amazing its all in the way they are raised.

Oh yeh, I totally get that

Oh yeh, I totally get that you need to raise all kids the same and, as you mentioned, not coddle them. I think SD (she's not strictly my step) is going to grow up to be a very decent person. She doesn't get money or stuff thrown at her. I do sometimes buy her things she asks for, even though it's not my responsibility. But I only do that because she rarely asks for things, and usually it's only something small like a chocolate bar.

There's no chance of her competing for her dad's affections. She thinks he's a tosser. A fair judgement if I may say.

Can I ask you what you mean

:jawdrop: Can I ask you what you mean that he is a tosser? :O

I have 2 SD's. I have a

I have 2 SD's. I have a favorite. The younger girl. I didn't have the boy vs girl thing to choose from.. but honestly, if I had, I would have preferred the boys I think. Girls have too much more mental "baggage" and complexity.. boys are just well boys. haha.

It might be that you are male and I am female... so I am more wary of my own kind:)

Meh, I like complexity. And

Meh, I like complexity. And to be honest, I sympathise with what girls have to go through - painful and sometimes embarassing periods, hair growth in a society that makes it feel unnatural, all the pressure on girls to look pretty and stay skinny, boys objectifying them as they mature.

Do you not like the boys

Do you not like the boys because of competition?

what the hell???

That's why good parents raise

That's why good parents raise their boys not to objectify girls.

I take my boy skid over the

I take my boy skid over the girl any day, she truly thinks her shi* doesn't stink, lol, as a matter of fact she is so set on being perfect that she will tell you that she doesn't poop.

Behind every successful

Behind every successful business is a perfectionist. It might serve her well.

There are as many

There are as many disadvantages to being a perfectionist as there are advantages. I say this as a realist, lol.

I think that it really

I think that it really doesn't matter boy or girl. What matters is that they are raised to have respect for people and taught manners. It all starts at home.

Exactly!!

I have three kids. At any

I have three kids. At any given point in time, each has been my favorite. Any parent who tells you they don't have a favorite is not being honest...

Skids? Nah, I don't have a favorite. I am totally disengaged

Yep... I know for a fact i'm

Yep... I know for a fact i'm my mom's favourite of three kids and always will be. We just "click" really well. Our personalities are so similar and we have tons of the same interests, whereas it's not like that with my siblings. Nothing wrong with that

OP, I think it's cute that you have this interest in your stepdaughter! That's a great way to start building a healthy relationship as stepparent/stepkid.

My favorite skid is the any

My favorite skid is the any one of them who isn't around...

The boys are slightly more tolerable than the girls. The girls can go suck rocks.

LMAO That can be so true!

LMAO That can be so true! }:)

Oh no way - I will take a boy

Oh no way - I will take a boy any day of the week. Teenage girls are insufferable, especially spoiled princesses.

Well according to the OP

Well according to the OP girls are adorable right through adulthood. :jawdrop: My bet the OP's SD is 4 not 14.

Dovina this 14 year old is

Dovina this 14 year old is his GF's daughter. He is 33. ???

Ahh just reread post. May

Ahh just reread post. May December romance? LOL

The GF may have been a

The GF may have been a teenager when she had her daughter.

I am thinking that his GF is

I am thinking that his GF is older than BF. Maybe?

He sounds like a love smitten

He sounds like a love smitten teenager talking about her. If my DSO had talked about my 15yo, at the time, he would not have made it past the 6 month stage.

I am glad you said that. Just

I am glad you said that. Just what I was thinking.

I thought it was a woman

I thought it was a woman posting originally and then when I realized, I couldn't get it out of my head.

I don't know what kind of

I don't know what kind of teenage males you know, but if they were smitten in the way you disgustingly imply I am they'd be using far more explicit language than that.

Sorry, but girls are NOT

Sorry, but girls are NOT adorable all of the time. Gads, some of the things we've read about from other stepparents. The BS that SDthen16 pulled on my DH. The BS I dealt with just a few weeks ago...

That is a completely INCORRECT blanket statement. And a tad creepy.

"A tad creepy" I will have

"A tad creepy" I will have to agree.

I didn't say they were

I didn't say they were adorable all of the time. Nobody is anything all of the time.

But generally speaking, I find girls more tolerable than boys.

I have a favorite, too...the

I have a favorite, too...the one who gives me less trouble.

It's more difficult to like a child who is histrionic and manipulative...especially since some of that manipulation is coming directly from BM.

^^^^ Yes... I only have 1 SD

^^^^ Yes... I only have 1 SD no SS.... im sure if i did i would have just as much problems with him.

Its natural to gravitate toward who ever give less grief.

"My partner's daughter is

"My partner's daughter is nearly 14. I find her adorable. She is at that age where she likes to pretend she's all grown up, but in many ways she is still very dependent. So that kind of dilemma is quite funny and endearing to watch. She is mature for her age (more mature than her bio dad that's for sure), intelligent, kind, but she is also quite girly."

Am I the only one who thinks a grown ass man talking about a 14 year old like this is creepy? Remove the first sentence and it sounds like a boy talking about a girl he has a crush on.

Disney, you are not. See the

Disney, you are not. See the last comment in my above post.

I didn't ready the replies

I didn't ready the replies before posting. I was so bothered by the OP, I just posted what I was thinking

I posted same thing. His SD

I posted same thing. His SD may be a wonderful young girl, the way he expresses it is off putting.

I didnt even put the 2

I didnt even put the 2 together or even realize OP was male.

This is actually very disturbing now :O

Isn't that a bit sexist? Oh

Isn't that a bit sexist? Oh you realised I was a man talking affectionately about a girl so he must be some kind of weirdo.

You do know that in British English "cute" means something different. It's the same word you would use for a kitten.

What you are posting I am

What you are posting I am thinking.

But you're not thinking, are

But you're not thinking, are you? You're just projecting.

You might find it creepy if

You might find it creepy if you have a warped mind.

I'm sorry if what I said was interpreted like that. Says more about you though, I think.

Have you shared these

Have you shared these thoughts with the girl's father, grandfather, uncles...? How about with people in your inner circle?

Try sharing this with them and see how they react.

Well her dad's as paranoid

Well her dad's as paranoid and emotionally obtuse as a few of you seem to be, so probably best I don't!

I do believe there are

I do believe there are favorites. I have talk all day & hang out with my stepson that is 16 but I really dislike my "stepdaughter" who is 13. I'm not sure if it's her attitude towards me or the fact that we found out she was not his biological daughter a few months ago so in a way I feel like I shouldn't deal with a person who has no relation to my husband.

I’ve got to say I think the

I’ve got to say I think the issue with your SS's is more one of parenting than anything else. I don’t know anyone with boys who allows them to behave that way.

That being said, I have a strong preference as well but I prefer boys over girls and my skids are no exception. I like my SS11 and can’t stand my SD12.

My skids basically have the opposite, stereotypical gender traits. SD12 is hyperactive, destructive, grotty, lazy, rough, selfish, completely insensitive and lacking in empathy. SS11 is very clean and tidy, sensitive and just adorable.

If I ever have my own kid I really hope it's a boy.

Mum tries to regulate their

Mum tries to regulate their confrontations, but when they happen they can do so without warning. Obviously the solution is to separate them when it happens, but by that time the "damage" has been done and I'm already half way out the front door. I cannot mentally cope with arguing. My parents argued all the time when I was a kid and I learned to go out and play in the garden when it all kicked off. I still do the same today!

It's funny how we can prefer a certain sex over the other. My experience with girls (don't read that the wrong way people!!!) has been generally positive. My experience with boys, however, not so. I don't know if that's just pure coincidence or that I genuinely have a higher tolerance for girls.

I think that you voluntarily

I think that you voluntarily completely miss the point at hand. It is not about cute, it is about behavior and quality of decisions. If you are plastering over your SD's behavioral issues due to her "cuteness" and overly critical of your SS's because they do not appeal to your chosen aesthetic of cute then that does not speak very highly of you now does it?

Don't get me wrong. I completely understand that there can be a visceral dislike for someone that is far from logical. I am not immune to that myself. However, when I recognize those feelings and dissect those feelings and the surrounding situation I without fail find a behavioral element to the disdain that I am feeling. I then address those behaviors directly with the perpetrator(s).

I have a question. How old are the boys? That may have something to do with your disdain for them.

I would suggest that you have some work to do on yourself in this situation and if you cannot address those issues then you need to do all of these kids and your SO a favor and move on.

You are here

Yes, I have a favourite. Sorry.