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STEPTSON FROM HELL BECAUSE OF MIL

agirly92's picture

***POST WARNING*****

I am going to start by making some things clear: 1—My husband is stupid/ yes, I know this. 

I met my husband in 2011, but we did not start dating until 2012. He had a 1-year-old son, and I knew what came with this, but I did not expect what came with his mother.

When I first met his mother, she was rude as hell, but I ignored her. As the years went by, I would call him out by calling him a "mama's boy" because he would stand up to her. 

When I got pregnant with my first child in 2014, she straight up told me, "My grandson is my only grandchild." I told her that was perfectly fine because I did not want her near my child. I was fine with that distance relationship, and she was not in the same state as me, so I kept her away from my daughter and had my peace.

Fwd. She told my stupid husband that he had to go to court and make her have custody of her precious grandson (this will come into play later). With that, she took my husband's son with her and honestly I just kept out of it

As the years went on, we moved to another state, and my husband was ready to have his son live with us. I was fine with it because I mean, why not? My MIL at the time was not happy because we were going to be further away from her. She had friends who worked in family court and were able to modify the custody papers ( this will come into play soon).

We were living fine so far, but MIL started to miss her precious grandson back, so she went to my husband's baby, and together, they took my husband to court for kidnapping. YES, that's right, my husband's own mother took him to court for kidnapping, and the judge (her friend) granted my MIL majority custody and the baby custody ( we found this out this year when we went to court).

Anyway, she had this child with her, and by the age of 8, he was corrupted—and I mean corrupted. This kid could not do anything by himself: take a shower, brush his teeth, tie his shoes, feed himself, read and write, or do his own homework. One thing that we noticed was his hate for me, it was very strong and noticeable. He refused to eat if I was in the house, he refused to be near me, and I started to think I smelled because of this kid.

Anyway, my MIL ended up giving my husband his son because her marriage was falling apart, and her husband could no longer take the disrespect from this child, so they were on the verge of divorce.

Now, my stepson from hell lives with us, and life has been hell. He's failing in school, and constantly lying to his teachers (shyt today he almost got his aid fired because of a lie he told)

My husband and I are now arguing every single day because of this kid and slowly I am starting to hate a 13-year-old child let me explain why: he pisses and shyt in his closet because he doesn't want to go to the bathroom he said "I want that B to clean it up, B referring to me, He is constantly lying and stealing, and when he gets caught he will tell more lie, he refused to listen to me or acknowledge my presence, he doesn't respect me and said his mama ( MIL) told him to not respect me til I respect him. 

Trust me, we got him tested, and they told him that besides ADHD, he is fully aware of what he is doing and choosing to do the things he does.

I am so sick of everything and ready to divorce my husband and take my girls because I am so fed up with this; I was pregnant with twins and lost them because of the stress with this kid. My husband says he sees how his son treats me but he is not willing to have his son leave the house.

AgedOut's picture

Hon, your children need to be protected. They need to not have this feral boy as their influence. You need to protect your girls.Get those girls out of these, save them from your DH and his monster of a child. 

Evil4's picture

My former career allows me to say that pissing and shitting in his closet is not even remotely close to normal or healthy. It's freaking serious. That is a HUUUUUUGE red flag. Take your girls and run. Get them out of there yesterday. 

Even if your DH wasn't weak and actively sought therapy for your SS, it's a long road and it should involve not having him in a home with other kids. However, based on your DH saying he won't have your SS leave the house, I would say he's either weak or in denial to the significance of SS' budding personalty disorder and is failing to protect the other kids in the house. He's failing his son, he's failing his wife, and he's failing your girls. He is not going to take the steps needed for the best interest of all parties. It is therefore on you to be the mother your girls need you to be and protect them. They cannot reside with your SS. 

If you don't want to leave your DH, you can always tell him that you aren't breaking up with him but until the kids are grown up and launched you and your girls need to live elsewhere.

Harry's picture

He needs help badly.  Maybe live in institutions help.  Nothing is normal about this kid and DH isn't doing anything about it. Even "stupid" people know they need help.  Tell DH he has to get this kid help.  Live somewhere help.  You are not going to be part of the clown train.  Untill he gets off his as* and dies something, SS can't live with you.   

agirly92's picture

We had another big argurment after I made this post and I asked my husband for a divorce and for now we are going to seperate til his son finish middle school and leave to go to the bio mom. SO me and my girls will be going to my mom till their brother leaves

**My husband came home from work and said that he had spoken to his mother (MIL) and she was not happy about the decision to sent her "precious grandson to his bio mom". and right when he told me she text me expressing how it's my fault that her son is sending his child away. I just don't understand because she did not have any decision in the making of this child but I am not responding to her because I don't think I am in the right mind space for her drama

Rumplestiltskin's picture

Stay far far away from SS. He has severe mental problems and they aren't your fault, but his animosity toward you is scary. Protect yourself and your girls. 

agirly92's picture

It took some years, but finally speaking up and wanting this child away from me and my girls felt so good because the last few years have genuinely been miserable 

Rags's picture

I would  tell MIL that she took the kid and then abandoned him so she gets no opinion.  Not to mention that he is a huge risk to the safety fo your own young children.
 

Rumplestiltskin's picture

If MIL has been raising him, she is responsible for the fact that he is a teenager who pees and poops in his closet and says he did it because he wants his stepmom to clean it up. How fk'd is that? My mom had a Yorkie who did that when it was mad at someone. This is a teenage human.