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BM and SD16 contacting our old friends

Childless stepmom's picture

Yeah just seems weird. SD 16 came to spend a week with for the first time in about a year as she had a fall out with BM. So we find out our old friends who we no longer spend time with have kept in contact with SD16 via social media and they talk often. ... what's up with that. SD asked me why I don't talk to one of my best friends anymore. I said I do, just not that often. SD said that this friend is upset with me for not congratulating her on something... clearly indicating they talking. So I confronted my friend and asked her what is going on. She said SD contacted her to ask what my number was, which is stupid as she has it. Anyway, whatever. But now we find out it's more than just one friend and some have been visiting with BM. The ones we definitely do not talk to. Why is this so messed up. Who does that

sammigirl's picture

Your SD is trying to come between you and your friends. Just ignore it. Accept your friends for the relationship you had, before your toxic SD. It's known as jealousy. Sounds as if your SD and BM are jealous of any life you have without their permission. That is also known as control. They want to control your life, when they carry these tales.

My grown SD cannot stand for me to have any life without she knows everything about it. She does the same thing with my family and friends, you describe here. After 37 years of this toxic woman in my life, I disengaged 7 years ago and ignore her communication with my friends and family. I'm sure she still does it to find out what I am doing. I do not say anything to my friends and family about my SD and therefore I have nothing to worry about.

If you break away from your friends, because of SD16, that is what she and BM would like. Ignore their worthless time wasting games. Don't talk to them, about them, or involve them in your life whatsoever; you will lead a more peaceful life without this garbage. Whatever you do, don't ask your friends what they say or repeat anything they say to you about anyone. It's a narcissist game these type of people play.

It took me way too long to not care any more.

Childless stepmom's picture

Ah thanks. Some great advise here. Makes me feel better that other people have also experienced the madness of narcissism played out by SD and BM.

Thumper's picture

Normal

Acratopotes's picture

block SD and BM immediately from all social media, they do not have to know who's your new friends,
then write off the older ones being friends with BM and SD, you do not need these drama stirring sh%ts in your life..

SD and BM is jealous of you and are stirring the pot, let them lol.... ignore them and if SD says something about oh ACra is sad cause you have not congratulate her, smile and say - I did I even send her flowers and we had a great lunch as well, where do you come up with your stories and why are you trying to be involved with my friends?

SD will immediately think Acra lied to her..... Acra will deny it, and you keep with your story... this can be so much fun lol