Had 1st conversation with husband about possibly leaving.

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Last night I felt empowered for the first time to talk to my husband about our relationship, and that I was thinking we may need to take a break from eachother. I have suspected he had someone on the side so I expected him to say OK. He didn't. He was scared and so apolgetic about everyting.

This morning he calls me and tells me he has me booked for a day at the spa, and had flowers delivered. My favorite, of course.

It is pretty sad that I am suspicious of such a thoughtful gesture. I did manage in our conversation to tell him that he needs to deal with the family issues that upset me so, and to not just apologize and let them continue. I hope he really means it.

I do not think that "taking a

I do not think that "taking a break" in a marriage is ever a good idea. When I have screwed up and pissed off my wife, which I recently have done, the last thing I want to do is give her the idea that I want a break or to separate when it would be easy to think that calling it quits is the right thing.

If you are going to take a break it is far healthier on a marriage to do it when things are going well than when they are going poorly. IMHO.

Hopefully your concerns regarding infidelity are wrong.

As for fixing the problems, ABSO-FRICKIN-LUTELY!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am working on that very thing myself right now. Mine is mostly a medical issue but I did send the North Forest bouquet of flowers to my wife at work today with a sincere apology card.

Fortunately she has been forgiving and is engaging with me in helping solve my issues as her below e-mail indicates.

"R,

I have the most beautiful flower arrangement on my desk! You definitely got lots of points with the women! They arrived as many people were leaving for lunch. Thank you babe!"

Whew, I dodged that bullet but mostly I have an amazing and understanding bride who is as interested in continued marital bliss as I am.

Good luck.

I have to say taking a break

I have to say taking a break only works if you are boyfriend and girlfriend - usually when a couple takes a break one or the other will date others and in most cases one will sleep with someone else. As boyfriend and girlfriend if this happens then you can choose to either get back together or then end it permanently - if this happens in a marriage this is very bad - at least when I got married in my heart and in front of God and family and friends my DH is the only man that I am ever going to be intimate with again for as long as I live - lord willing. So I feel when you tell someone you need to take a break you have to be prepared that if they agree the other person might feel that gives them the okay to sleep with someone else. This does not work in a marriage.

You need to sit your DH down have a talk with him - and this is not about being empowered this is about a woman going to her husband and having a heart to heart talk about the two of you. Being husband and wife you should be able to go to your husband at anytime and talk about anything the you want. In my marriage no topic is off limits and he knows that I will check his phone or mail or if I feel something is off I will call him out on it - there is a deep level of trust and honesty in our relationship. So you need to ask hubby if there is someone else and if there isn't then you need to discuss with him why you feel this way and it does sound like he loves you and does not want to lose you and is making an effort to make you feel better. You need to open up and talk - men can't read minds and they want to know what is wrong so let him know what is bothering you.

I STRONGLY ADVISE AGAINST TAKING A BREAK!!! You lost the taking a break privilege when you took your vows with your husband now you have to take the talk and work it out path - you being married are beyond the taking a break stage!! Good luck Sweetie and I will be praying that you feel comfortable and strong enough to say what you have to to DH and that you both work this thing out and come out stronger on the other side!!

Taking a break from my first

Taking a break from my first husband lead to him filling that break time with the person I was afraid he was seeing behind my back (which he wasn't). Sure he messed up to but I certainly didn't help by leaving. If you want it to work stay and fight the good fight. If you do find he is cheating though......leave and dont look back.