This is just gross to me. Opinions?
My stepson is 15. I have teenagers as well. Please tell me if I'm wrong.
I want to raise strong independent responsibility people. My ex and I are on the same page. I do not do my teens laundry. I do not pack their bags for them when they are going to dad's house. I do not clean their rooms for them. They have responsibilities and it's expected.
My stepsons do nothing at their mom's house. Apparently she does their laundry, reminds them to do their homework, packs them when coming to our house so SS gets here and he's all pissed off because we expect him to be responsible. Their mom packs their schedule to the point that they can't take responsibility for anything yet she states he's old enough to make his own decisions. Yeah ok.
So last night he has swim practice and DH picks him up and takes him here. Younger SS has baseball practice so DH tells oldest that while he's gone he needs to put his wet stuff in the washing machine, take a shower and do his homework. What does he do instead? Plays video games. Then DH gets home and he THEN starts to do his homework. He was up until midnight at this point, didn't do his laundry, didn't shower ect.. and said to DH "why can't you just do my laundry?"
Okay so I get it. They are teenagers. These things happen. The issue I have is that SS expects everyone to pamper him and do everything for him and when we ask him to take responsibility he throws a temper tantrum. Are we wrong to expect this of him? Are we asking too much?
Nope, you're not asking too
Nope, you're not asking too much. My SDs are 6 and 8 and while they don't run the machines, they're expected to get their dirty laundry into their hampers and to fold and put away their clean clothes when they come out of the dryer. I was doing my laundry at 15, also. If I was super busy or in a bind my mom might throw a load in for me while she was doing laundry, but she didn't do it regularly. Playing video games wouldn't count as being busy, either.
If SS didn't get his chores or schoolwork done because he was playing video games, he should lose his video game privileges. Of course, the problem your DH is going to have If he's requiring chores and responsibility while mommy does everything for the skids and is high conflict and badmouthing dad for that and everything else, is that the skids won't want to come over and HCBM won't want to make them and will say they're too old for her to force them to go. But not insisting on responsibility and consequences is a disservice to the kids, so it's a tough spot. I agree with Futuro that you need to disengage and let your husband deal with this.
I hope your DH told him that
I hope your DH told him that he knew damn well how to do the laundry and that he wasn't going to do it for him... he didn't raise him to be a lazy sloth.
Sadly... abortion is not a
Sadly... abortion is not a retroactive option to protect one's gene pool when a mistake like your skid unmasks himself.
smh