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007Lostit's picture

Well as some of you can tell by my reply posts, I am in a rather good mood today Smile I don't know if it will last or not but it feels good darn it! lol

I had a talk with DH last night, and I am hopeful that we are on the right track. Now as far as the SD17 is concerned...no I don't hold up any hope about her. But..DH asked if I be present when he talked to her (says I give him courage and that I remind him of things he forgets) so I agreed. As much as I did not want to. I let DH do 98% of the talking. He did good. Smile

He had to let SD know that running away was a HUGE deal and it deserves consequences. Because up to this point she felt entitled to go and do whatever she felt she wanted. She has been told "no", and so far was okay with that, but she had plans for a dance this weekend, so DH had to lay down the rules to her clearly and concisely so there is not confusion. Plus she has felt that she could slack on her chores and not help around the house etc. Not okay by me for the damage she has done.

DH was "afraid" to have this talk with her, and had put it off till we talked about it and I basically told him that he had to grow a pair and get it over with. He thought she may try to run away again...he thought she would get angry...all sorts of things he was "afraid" to face. But knew he had to. I told him that she was holding him hostage this way and has been for many years. He has had little follow through on any punishments and that is why she does what she does now. It has to stop here and now if she is to remain in our house. It was an ultimatum of sorts and he knows that our house can not withstand another manipulation by her of this magnitude. So he manned up. Proud of him.

Sd...surprisingly...did not freak out. She was not "happy" about not being able to go to the dance. But accepted the consequences. I think she is ok with it for now, because the guy she ran away to go out on the date with, apparently dumped her for someone else. Is it ok if I laugh at this, or is that just mean? lol I can't help myself. I am not holding my breath that she will remain so harmonious with this punishment, but there does seem to be a sliver of understanding.

She still feels it is perfectly ok for her to dump her problems onto others. Because she thinks that the parents of the girl whose house she ran away to will take her in...."they said I can stay with them"....that is wonderful that you think you can run away from your problems and dump them in someone else lap to deal with. Oh the immaturity and stupidity.

We shall see how things progress from here. Today I am happy. I will leave it at that. One day at a time in this crazy house.

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007Lostit's picture

Really? She is still in high school...done in five months but turns 18 in two months. DH would like her to stay till she graduates at least, and he is hopeful that she may straighten out and stay longer. ..... I do not see that happening...the staying longer then graduating that is.

His son turned 18 the summer just before his senior year, and he took off one week later. lol. Then he dropped out of high school. So I think he is fearful that she will not graduate if she leaves. I could care less...these skids have caused nothing but chaos, heartache, and stress.

Where did your sd go? did you care? what did you dh do?