Things are finally turning around......
I think FH is getting it. After almost three years together, three years of drama and fights and arguments and tears, he finally understands. Our relationship is stronger than it ever was. We are both dedicating time to our relationship, FH is making time for us to develop as a couple. I'm actually happy girls.
I work Sundays, and for the past few weeks, I've come home to a clean house. Laundry is done, bed is made, ktichen is clean, house is vacuumed. He's running baths for me, brings me coffee in the morning while I'm getting ready for work...Hugs and kisses and back rubs. Flowers delivered to my work...I looked at him last night after we got back from dropping the kids off and he had finished wiping the counters down and told him that he is a wonderful man. The look he gave me was.....priceless. He told me that seeing me smile and happy is all he wants in his day, and if doing something little like that will make it happen, he'll never stop.
Everything with GEM is working out. Papers were filed last week amending custody, all our demands were met, no CS will be exchanged. FH is establishing boundaries and putting GEM in her place. Issues with the children are handled by both of us. He supports me in every decision I make, and asks me before making any on his own.
We've finally found our balance.
It may seem like three years is too long to fight for some, or not long enough to others. This message is to let others know that there is hope. There have been a few times that I have considered walking away, but I persevered, and am glad that I did. This is the man that I fell in love with, this is the man that I want to be with. This is the man that I respect and choose to spend my life with. He wasn't always this way, but whatever happened to make him this way now, I am thankful for it.
There is hope.
- 2Bloved's blog
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2Bloved, your situation sounds familiar!
Being in a relationship is difficult enough without having the added stress of a BM or SK's in the mix. One piece of advice that I've always relied on is that relationships are like gardens, they need constant attention and weeding in order to flourish. I am so happy that you and FH are working things out together and finding a happy balance. I only hope that you two grow closer together as you support each other through life.
Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils ... - Louis Hector Berlioz
Thank you Snarky
It's nice to share something positive. I love your garden analogy too, by the way. It's so true. I have the same hopes for our future too!!
I am really happy for you!
Congratulations!
It is also nice to know that with hard work, life can stabilize and balance can be accomplished.
Thank you for this post. I am a year and a half in and am looking forward to proper balance. We both have a little work to do in that respect, but we are working on it. It is good to know that with the work can come an outcome like yours.
Thank you!!
It was hard. Very very hard. I don't usually post much on here, but it's been an uphill battle our entire relationship. Everything that could have been thrown at us, we've conquered. I know there will still be issues, but hopefully we'll be able to work on them like we have been.
good for you!
Nice to read something positive! Can I send my DH to your for lessons?![Wink](https://prod-cdn-1.ststatic.com/sites/all/modules/contrib/smiley/packs/kolobok/wink.gif)
LOL Sia
I don't know what happened or what I did!!
I think b/c I was so happy and relaxed that the house was clean that my demeanor towards him changed, and he noticed. Positive reinforcement. The more he did, the better our relationship. I made sure to let him know how much I appreciate him, and that helps too. It's finally an equal partnership.
It does help that the crap with GEM is under control too!!
Gosh, I hope it's not a trend!!!
Crossing my fingers that it's a lifestyle change!!
I'm going to continue to smile and be loving and affectionate. It seems to be encouraging him.
Looking back, he's been making little changes for about eight weeks now. And our life has been getting progressively better and better.
If there's still love and respect in your relationship, please do not give up. It can't always be bad. Things do get better. Time, love, and sometimes a swift kick in the ass can do wonders!!
Yippee!!
Miracles can happen![Smile](https://prod-cdn-1.ststatic.com/sites/all/modules/contrib/smiley/packs/kolobok/smile.gif)
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Age cannot wither her, nor custom stale
Her infinite variety.
William Shakespeare, "Antony and Cleopatra", Act 2 scene 2
That is super great. Good
That is super great. Good for you.