Apparently I need a psychiatrist now.
DH and I go to couples counseling a couple times per month. This last session was interesting. The counselor told me my resentment is totally normal but she also thinks I am depressed and overly anxious and need to see a psychiatrist. Of course DH was in full agreement with her and went on a diatribe about how "negative" I am all of the time. While I don't deny that I have always had a more "glass half empty" way of looking at things (and I know that I need to work on it)... it was still hard to hear.
After a death and serious illness in the family, I just want some time to relax. Did I ever mention that DH has his friend living for free at my house for over a month now? It was initially supposed to be "no more than 3 weeks until he finds a place and he will give us money" and it has been over a month and we have not received a dime. Of course he still pays for a shiny BMW and takes little 21 year olds to fancy dinners... but can't pay us.
I finally told him this morning he has until Mid May and then needs to be out. Between the skids and a house guest I have no damn privacy!!! I need a house on a private island ASAP!
Anyway, off to go make this psychiatrist appointment............
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He moved from another state
He moved from another state and is "looking for a place." A childhood "friend" of DH. I let DH talk me into it thinking it would be a very brief stay........ I should have listened to my gut. The guy is a cheapskate and a liar. Don't like him at all. DH is the biggest pushover ever. Lets the guy walk all over us.
First of all, having someone
First of all, having someone else living with you can put a great strain on a relationship. DH and I agreed when we first started living together that NOBODY would live with us.
Second, from your first blog, it seems your DH expects a lot from you as far as his kids are concerned and that he is not so great at parenting them himself.
Sounds like you need some YOU time.
Obviously these issues are
Obviously these issues are what have been causing the anxiety and depression. Has the therapist been trying to help you guys with these specific problems, or is she just going right to medication?
I don't have anything against meds., it just would be a shame if you had to take something because of some incompetent assholes.
She has been working with us
She has been working with us for quite awhile and she told me my concerns are legitimate but my anxiety seems to be "too consuming." She isn't wrong, I have always struggled with anxiety and bouts of depression but DH and his "situation" definitely make it worse. I am a very private person and to me there is nothing worse than a house guest (who seems to have no motivation to leave) taking up my already small space... then add the skids into the mix. It is hell. I am really trying to start asserting myself. I have spent way too long allowing things to happen that I am uncomfortable with. (i.e. skids taking over my bedroom, house guests, poor discipline)...
I would be extremely
I would be extremely uncomfortable in your situation as well!
I was going to say the same as LadyFace...your husband needs to be more supportive of you or nothing will ever get better.
You may be at the point where a little medication could help you better deal with added stressors that you're facing right now, and it may not have to be a long-term thing.
This reminds me of a meme I
This reminds me of a meme I see once in a while that goes something like this:
Before taking medication for anxiety or depression, make sure you aren't just surrounded by a$$holes.
Go see a shrink with a smile
Go see a shrink with a smile on your face. Stave off advice on meds. Your marriage counselor just gave you a golden ticket. You get to have someone analyze your patterns of behavior and help you develop the skills you need to create boundaries with the people in your life.
I have a feeling your H is going to regret setting you up like that. Use your time wisely with the doctor.