back to it never being the kids fault
Ss7 visitation begins...
I pick up ss, as we are driving down the freeway he's pushing on the soft top window of the vehicle til it's barely holding on. Miracle it didn't fly off. I bit my tongue.
SS goes in the house and opens his backpack full of toys
Dh: where did you get all of those?
SS: my teacher gave them to me.
Dh: no really, where did you get them?
SS: my teacher gave them to me.
I bit my tongue.
Dh: do you have homework?
SS: yeah
Dh: go put it on the table so we don't forget to do it. What do you have? You said you didn't have any last time.
SS: I had some last time
Dh: you told me you didn't
SS: no I didn't. You must have forgot
I bit my tongue.
Dh says to me- he seems better this time.
I say- aside from the weird lying
He looks at me puzzled- his mom probably told him that
REALLY???
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Comments
What's the deal with this
What's the deal with this "not allowed" crap?? Being a SM doesn't make you less of an adult. If the kid is lying, call him out on it.
If your husband gets upset, then hell, tell his ass off and keep it moving.
what is it with these people
what is it with these people thinking their kids never do anything wrong? i am the first one to correct my kids when they screw up. i certainly don't blame everyone else and act like it's not possible for them to ever be wrong. they are going to have a hard reality coming when they are adults, and so will dh if he expects the rest of the world to treat them like he does.
I am glad I read this. I used
I am glad I read this. I used to try and defend DH to my own rational thinking. Like, I would tell myself, "Ok, well, maybe if I had my own chld, I would understand, maybe I would be too permissive too", but then I would snap out of that crazy talk and be like "HELL NO!!" I would be more concerned with not raising an idiot than with being my kids friend. I would not tolerate what DH does, and him doing so, is just a disservice to this child, because he is going to raise an entitled, spoiled, self important, whack job. I would want better for my kids, and being an over tolerant, non disciplining, pushover door mat is not the way to do right by them.
Fedup, I HAVE one of these
Fedup, I HAVE one of these brat kids too. He is on this entitled-I-don't-have-to-listen trips. He's 13 and currently living with my xh because he doesn't want to follow my rules. He has resentment over ss doing things that he would be in trouble for. Yeah, I get that , but it doesn't mean he's allowed to be a jerk. I love both my bs's, but disrespect is NOT something I condone. I hope the lessons I've tried to teach them re emerge at some point, but right now they can keep their attitudes out of my home.
I pray every day that my DH
I pray every day that my DH will come to his senses and realize that he is not doing his kid any favors by being a pushover. I used to try and tell him that he is going to be sorry one day, that this kid will grow up with no respect for anyone or anything, INCLUDING HIM, because he as a father, never instilled that in him. I don't try and tell him anything anymore. He hasn't the slightest idea of what it means to be a real father. I don't have any children, but I had a DAMN good father, who would kick my ass if he were alive and could see what I put up with out of DH. My dad raised me right and I KNOW, no matter how much DH tries to make me feel like I am the one that is wrong, that one this, I am not. I foresee skid finally getting so bad that DH cannot continue to ignore it, like when he hits the teen years and decides he wants to really be the man of the house and fight DH or something, and then, it will be too late. At this point, I most likely will not be around, so oh well.
I picked him up because from
I picked him up because from BM because I was in the area. They live an hour away and we meet halfway for the exchange. I bite my tongue because the effort is no longer worth it but if I don't vent the stupidity, I bottle it up and explode, instead of being rational.
I have been put in that same
I have been put in that same predicament, I used to pick skid up for DH. Now, I wouldn't do it for ANYTHING. I still have a lot of anger, a lot of problems, my marriage is still teeter tottering on the edge of over, but taking myself out of the parent trap with this kid has helped me see things a little clearer. I am not a babysitter, I am not a chauffer, I am not his anything, nor do I want to be. I probably have permanent scars on my tongue from all the biting in the past, it is unhealthy, and like the other poster said, we are not meant to have to do that, and it turns us into a bitter, miserable ticking time bomb. MY DH and BM used and abused me every chance they got to make their lives easier, because in truth, BM COULD NOT WAIT to get rid of him, and DH, always pulled the work card, and guess who got stuck with the monster, me. NEVER AGAIN. When I do have to be around him now, it is still disgusting to see DH be dominated and run himself ragged pleasing this unpleasable kid, but, I cant make DH see reason, so I stopped trying.
Of COURSE BM would make her
Of COURSE BM would make her kid recite all the lies to tell Daddyo the following weekend. I mean I bet she has nothing better to do. It isn't like SS would actually make something up all on his little lonesome sao as to avoid trouble... :? :jawdrop: