Who is worse?

I've been a member of this site for a while and it seems that SDs are worse than SSs. In my case BM is worse than anyone else involved.

Beautiful Dreamer's blog
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I think that depends on the

I think that depends on the bio parents treatment of the skids.

I think SDs are often worse because BFs treat them with kid gloves and mini-spouses more often so the SM is competetion.

I don't have this issue - my SD12 and I get along ok. I don't pretend to be her mother, she is not my DHs wife.

But SS6 is another story. BM babies him to death, always has, always will because BM feels men are inferior to women and are incapable of doing anything for themselves, they are all stupid and should be wiped off the face of the earth - BUT as a small child, that manifests into coddling which maniftests as he needs her less to her constant mothering - which has taught SS6 everything is do be done for him.

DH follows suit. Because SS6 is now a demanding incapable brat, DH does the same as BM - he will reach over and feed him at every dinnertime, wipe his face for him with the napkin, tie his shoes, bathe him, things a 6 year old should be doing - the list goes on and on. If all 4 kids get a treat that is wrapped, SS will immediately hand his over to be unwrapped for him - stupid shit. SS6 is excused of any wrongdoing always as well by both parents involved.

SS6 is my main problem for this reason.

Wow my DD4 can tie her own

Wow my DD4 can tie her own shoes and do things most kindergartners can do. The few times we have seen SS he had acted worse than my 2 year old! Tantrums and fits are not tolerated by me or DH.

How old is your SS?

Oh wow I thought they were

Oh wow I thought they were teens!

I, too, am glad SS19 is male.

I, too, am glad SS19 is male. I don't feel competition for his father's affections or time. He still lives at home and dh DID make him be homeless for a week when he got kicked out of his second rehab ON OUR WEDDING DAY! He was in another city and called dh to come get him and dh told him no. I have 4 daughters and it definitely would have been harder to know they were on the streets. So much violence can happen to girls as we all know. SS19 looked haggard after a week, but the counselor at rehab had told dh just 2 days prior he had to hit rock bottom and dh could not enable him any longer. I was very proud of dh for doing something not all parents could do. Unfortunately, 3 weeks later, he had to kick him out again for doing drugs AGAIN in our house. Luckily, he saw reason, moved back in in December and will finally graduate high school this month. But, it was definitely the year from hell. Girls just cause emotional problems as I well know although my DD28 got pregnant at 19 and the ex and I supported her during that time. She was a college student, so lived at home while pregnant, put my wonderful grandson in an open adoption and went on went back to college. It had a happy ending. DGS8 has wonderful mature parents and my daughter is living life as she wanted.

I think it depends on the

I think it depends on the situation and your DH.

My DH gives into BM more than I would like but he does take up for me most of the time if she runs her mouth. I do not have a SD but I can see how that would be miserable if she was DH's little wife. :sick:

On the other hand, I have a SS16 that has been spoiled, cottled and breastfeed until he was 4 or 5 years old. He is not made to do anything he does not want to do either by DH or BM, especially BM. Whether that is go to school, work, chores or eat something he does not like or has never tasted. You have to make him special SS meals or both him and DH thinks the world will end.

And if you don't make over every little thing that he does or says like he is a 2 y/o you are not only his friend but his enemy (that's me). Because of course, that is what his parents do treat him like he is 2 so he expects it from everyone else too. :sick:

You poor thing. Please tell

You poor thing. Please tell me he doesn't live with you full-time. My dh got custody of his son when he was 4 and BM had to move out of state and back in with her parents. She's mentally ill, so hasn't really played any part of SS19's life. He doesn't go visit her and she can't afford to come here. Dh and she have been divorced since 1997, thank God. No BM to have to deal with. I get after dh when I DO see him treating his son like a child instead of the adult he's supposed to be. Ticks me off. I'll tell him "He's 19, not NINE."

We have joint custody. My DH

We have joint custody. My DH has gotten better with dealing with SS but it still drives me crazy when he treats him like a 2 year old. I am like REALLY, and I guess one day you expect this kid to support his self must less a dependent. And the BM is worse than DH!

My SD17 is a joy to be

My SD17 is a joy to be around, she is a really great young lady. My SS14 is the bitch that I thought his sister was going to be. Go figure.

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