BM decided to sign up BOTH SDs for dance classes at the end of the summer. She did this without consulting SO. Initially she told him to "help out when he can" and whatever he could contribute would be appreciated. She is well aware he has NO INCOME. I told him the only help he should give (when he can) would be purchasing dance gear for OUR HOME and even then I wasn't totally cool with that because she made the decision and she can deal with the consequence of the cost! After the first month of dance she started demanding money for dance. He emailed and explained she made this decision without consulting him. AND SD13 has expressed she's really not all that sure if she wants to continue with the dance classes. He says he wants to help out THE GIRLS if they decide to stay in it when he's done with school this month and after he finds a job. He has already given them money after being hounded by BM but it wasn't the entire amount she asked him for and so she won't back off! His complacent manner about dealing with her drives me bonkers!

A few months ago we hashed out YET AGAIN about the communication regarding non-er things. He agreed he wouldn't text or call BM if not an er or respond to her texts/calls. He said he would just email her. Well, his view of er is not the same as mine and I'm fed up with trying to make him realize that when he "caves" to her demands - even if it is less than 1/2 the dance money she asked for - he's just giving her more fuel to continue. A few days ago she sent a text THE DAY OF SD12's therapist appt to tell him it was that day and said to bring dance money with him. She's such an idiot --- asking someone who has no income the day of to come up with money is stupid! Needless to say, he didn't go to the appt as he had to much work to do. He didn't tell me if there was any backlash from BM about not going (and lately he's back to his ways of not informing me of what happens after telling me the initial BS ... which maybe is better but don't tell me the first part if you're not going to follow up with what happens later!).

Today he calls me while he's out running errands for his mom and informs me he was trying to reach SD13 but couldn't get an answer (he was trying to choose a cd his mom wanted to get for her but wanted to double check with SD that it was the right cd). He proceeds to tell me that he should have known better but he called BM to see if he could just talk to SD on BM's phone since SD wasn't answering her own. I sighed because I knew immediately that was a stupid move! He said as soon as she answered and he asked to talk to SD, BM went off about "I told you to give me dance money when you can not when you want. I have forked out over $600 for this and you've given $40 and that's it." He said fortunately SD was calling him back on her phone so he just said, "Oh nevermind, SD13 is calling me now." and he hung up. I just said, "Well, it serves you right. You should have known she was going to start something about it." And then I changed the subject. If he's not going to grow a pair and just say "I am not helping you for something YOU decided to do ON YOUR OWN." then I just don't want to hear about it. It makes me pissed off and just overall annoyed at the entire siutation ... it makes me even more ticked off at BM and at SO and I don't need to stress over BS that I can't control. I've said my peace about it and if he wants to let her continually be the biggest bit** about it, then go right ahead. There's plenty of ways to handle it and he's not taking any kind of action!

AND THEN SD13 tells him that BM "needs them back" a day early next weekend. Well, SO's dad will be up here for only the weekend and we are spending it with him. He is lucky to see SDs more than once a year so we are taking advantage of him being here and spending the two full weekend days with him before he flies back. SO asked her why BM needs them back and she didn't know. He told her to find out and let him know. Well, apparently they are going to get their Christmass tree that Sunday. Um, why schedule that for a weekend you don't have your children? Seriously, BM! SO just texted SD back and said, "Can't. Your Gpa will still be here that day and we have plans." He NEVER tells BM no when she requests them on his time .... I'm sure there's going to be some harsh words flying very soon .... I've said this before but I swear NO ONE else in this situation uses their flippin' head about anything except ME!