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Should I Pursue This?

Chel Bell's picture

As I wrote before, my DH & I moved away from BM......and I wrote a little about the harrassment she put me through, well it was really bad, and when I became pregnant, it got worse, before, during, and after my pregnancy she was always causing problems, putting me under ALOT of stress,,,,she even wished death on my baby....and I have on tape saying she wished I would die, and my husband. She has harrassed me so much and got away with it. Now that we moved I had to go see a doctor about the stress I still feel, I passed out once, and went to the hospital, they sent me to a doctor and I am now on meds. for depression/anxiety disorder. I'm also supposed to go to counseling, and I plan on telling the counseler all about BM. I still have the tapes of her ranting, and all the e-mails. I'm wondering if I should draw up a case against her.... as I will probably be on meds now for a very long time, if not for life. Any lawyers in the house????? I don't have any $$$, but maybe someone could take this case, if I even have one. Chel

Comments

Anonymous's picture

Let it all go, don't have any communication with the bm and move forward. Bm can't harass you unless you and dh are talking to her, if so; stop. Forget going to court ect. and wasting money. The best revenge is your happiness, and above all quit dwelling on her. This is what I see most on this site, and its bewildering. As someone has said your letting her rent space in your head.

Chel Bell's picture

Chel

h7's picture

Okay, first of all I've had to deal with the depresson/anxiety. It totally sucks, but I think as long as you are away from the source, things might get a little better now. I suggest counselling. Definitely tell them about the BM & ask them what they think you should do. It might help you feel like you have more power over the situation...
...then again, it might add to your anxiety/depression. Holding people accountable is healthy sometimes, but confronting them & actually bringing charges against someone brings up a larger battle. That brings on more anxiety & depression if things start to look down.

Ask yourself if you can handle more stress right now. If you are sure you can, then go for it! If not, see if there are other things that might help you feel as if you have more control (because often, that's what anxiety/depression stem from)like a self defense class or maybe more knowledge of your rights.

Now, when I lived in Houston, I was really stressed. Anxiety ran high, but I didn't want to take major meds for them. I found this stuff called 5-HTP. It's a suppliment (look it up on Wikipedia) & it works. It doesn't get rid of the anxiety, but it takes the edge off. Make sure it's safe to use with whatever meds you are already taking (do not take with psychotic drugs. DO NOT take it with Benedryl, it will mess with your mind & give you the weirdest dreams that you can't wake up from.) It worked for me, but it's only a suggestion. And I sound like a commercial again.

Hope this helps,
Hipi

Chel Bell's picture

I thank you for your responses, and you are right.....I have finally gotton away from this crazy person...it should stay that way, besides, if she knows how upset she got me, she'll love it, and then she wins!! NEVER. Chel

Anonymous's picture

I have dealt with a similar situation for about a year and a 1/2. I've suffered through repeated harrassment from BM including nasty e-mails filled with lies about fiance, her making the in-laws choose between her and I, the making of holidays a complete hell, her manipulating the fiance by using the kids against him to get rid of me...etc... Then I'd see him not tell her to F*** off because he has to treat her with kid gloves. I can feel the anxiety creeping up my spine just writing about it. Anyway, I was turning into a complete basketcase and not performing well at work. I gained weight, my general appearance faded and I stopped enjoying all the things that I once enjoyed. My friends were avoiding me because I started obsessing over BM and talking about her constantly. I even started believing her lies about still sleeping with fiance and drove by her house when he was "out". He wasn't there and the reason I looked was because I was definitely in a bad place mentally. Basically I had let this woman take over my life!! I had to let it go. I'm not sure what happened to make me realize this. I just woke up one day and decided to let it go. It was either that or I had to break off my relationship with fiance. Don't get me wrong, I hate this woman and have to constantly be on my guard with her I just don't care nearly as much anymore.