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I'm not sure where to go from here

Confused50's picture

Submitted by Confused50 on Fri, 04/01/2016 - 9:56am

I'm lost and not sure where to go from here. I've been married for 10 months now and was dating for 2 years prior. I have (2) grown and out the house kids. My Wife has (3) adopted children (Ages 20,9,7) and (1) additional god child (age 1) that live with us. The 20 year old is currently away at college and pregnant, however once she have the baby she would like to return to college 4 hours away and the bew born will be left with us to raise.

My wife and I both work full time jobs 8a-5p. Each mornings, she iron the kids clothes and I take them to school. I then pick them up after school and bring them to my job to save money on the after school fees. I also, take them to gymnastics 2-3 times a week after work. Once we get home I cook 99% of the time and make sure bathes are done and the kids are in the bed on time. When she get home she immediately goes up stairs, get on her ipad, turn the tv on, and get in the bed. She eat dinner in the bed while multi tasking in leisure entertainment.

Not to further mention that I'm in school online full time. I will so overwhelmed. I don't feel like (as a step parent) I need to be the only one cooking, cleaning, taking care of the kids, disciplining the kids and making sure the house run smoothly. She let the kids run wild and I'm used to that. I'm from the military and I believe that children should be well mannered. Most of the time, I feel like she married me to raise her children. Further, I like to sleep with the tv off, she must sleep with the tv on. Not only that we must watch what she want to watch (totally different from what I like to watch). I'm very OCD and want the carpets to stay as clean as possible so I ask that EVERYONE remove their shoes at the front door upon entering. She has yet to take off her shoes even after I ask her to.

I'm becoming so frustrated, wore out and tired. I don't feel appreciated. A big part of me want to leave and go rent me a place to live although I have a house that I'm purchasing. I'm not sure how much more I can take of this situation.

Advice Please.....

Comments

Aeron's picture

Submitted by Aeron on Fri, 04/01/2016 - 2:10pm

Where to go from here.... To the 3 to 5 best lawyers in your area to get advice on leaving this leech.

This is occurring because you are allowing it. If you can't just drop the rope because of your OCD or whatever, you need to leave. This is a ridiculous situation for you to be in - raising 4 and soon to be 5 kids that are not yours? No way.

notsurehowtodeal's picture

Submitted by notsurehowtodeal on Fri, 04/01/2016 - 4:18pm

I realize this was not the point of your post - but who irons kids clothes anymore? Seems like she could stop that and help in a more constructive manner.

As to caring for the children - you need to stop all of it. They are her kids, let her deal with them.

moeilijk's picture

Submitted by moeilijk on Fri, 04/01/2016 - 4:25pm

Is this a joke? Other than ironing, you take care of 2 children and 1 adult, and will soon be taking care of a newborn as well. You don't enjoy it, none of these people are your responsibility, and you want to stop. But you don't.

Who do you think has control over what you do?