I guess when you are broke having someone give you free money would be great! That's a great financial plan!! Just have people give you money!! And of course love is always expressed through the giving of money!! It's the only way to show you care! Geniuses 

I say all of this with the greatest amount of sarcasm you can possibly imagine. 
 

Stand your ground hon.

Hells to the no. I refuse to do this as well. It's yours and your kids' physical, emotional AND financial well-being that's at stake. If he needs a personal loan he can ask his parents or something, but it is not your job.

Lol what are this advisor's credentials? It sounds more like something your BF and maybe an idiot friend dreamed up over beers and thought they'd found a genius solution. I mean... you take out a loan and give it to him? Who would suggest something so absurd? Hilarious! 

It is very impractical to risk ones own financial well being and credit for someone else, no matter how much you love them. Especially if his financial status is dwindling.

This is coming from the friend part of the person, not the financial advisor part, and frankly, I find it appalling. That the "financial advisor" would advise such things AND that your BF would repeat them, as if they are valid solutions.

A friend of mine told me that if I am unwilling to do those suggestions, I obviously don’t love BF

Love and finances don't mix. It's a romantic notion that if you love someone, you should just do whatever. It's not realistic and it's not real life. Oh, and it's dumb.

Is your friend still in high school?

Boyfriend, that's not what my financial advisor says.

What was boyfriend smoking/ drinking/  thinking when he suggested this? 

Are you sure this guy is a certified financial advisor?  Are you positive your BF heard this or maybe "dreamed" it?  In any event, NO.  BFs are in our lives to help us, not to drain us.  Lol.

He has already paid about (Now $40,000 in legal fees) for the foolishness and shenanigans of BM.

So, exactly what is he paying for? They are already divorced, correct? He's trying to get more visitation time (that BM probably won't honor) or full custody or what?

I always wonder about the sanity and intelligence of people who end up paying these outlandish legal fees, fighting their exes in court, sometimes for years. Why? What is it really getting him? I'm truly asking, as I don't get it.

It just doesn't seem wise to spend so much money and going broke, fighting for years for something that doesn't usually come to pass, anyway. By the time this is over, his son will be of age.

Oh my goodness,  NO,  to everything that was suggested by your BOYFRIEND. 

I'd be marching down to meet with this financial planner. Pffft, doubt if this person said that, IF he did, I would be shocked.

Bet ya, bf came up with this garbage and FP said, well that might help.

Jmo

That sounds like worst advice anyone can give someone. Wow.. at least you're not falling for it! Haha 

You know, there are people you can pay to pretend to be a couples' therapist. The purpose is to have them convince your partner they are wrong. I've seen the ad. I wonder if that's what's going on with this "financial advisor." This is a huge red flag that your SO may not be trustworthy or good for you. 

get a new friend and new financial advisor. With the $$$ spent already, BF could have loads of cash by now. It doesnt make sense to fight in court and spend all that money.

You will need to be on guard with this crew.

His "friend" the "financial advisor" thinks you should sink everything into this guys issues? no. just no. 

I would tell him YOUR financial advisor told you that you would have a head full of rocks if you agreed..lol.

I mean, the "moving in" would be fine.. if it worked for all of you and his share of costs was less than him maintaining his own home...  BUT.. it has to work for you and your kids to have him there... AND he pays rent and portions of utilities .. so not FREE.. but it could help him if his bills were not as high as the amount he currently pays.

Taking out a loan for him? Uhhhh no.  He has flushed so much down the drain already.. why on earth would you throw your good money after bad?  for a boyfriend.. not even a husband?

Has your relationship maybe run it's course.. it's fairly ballsy for him to be asking you these things... like really taking advantage.

Noooooooooo!!!!!!  Don't do any of this!!!!  Please don't move in with him.  I was so thankful I had my own place when my bf's kids were living there with him.  They turned into drug addicts and were stealing from him!  Stole a bunch of checks out of his checkbook,  forged them and cashed them!!!

If the "financial advisor" is a friend, perhaps he could give BF a loan or let him move in with him. Wouldn't that be being a good friend?

Can you remind me how old your SS is? Is this custody battle even worth fighting?

Good for you for saying no.  Those are ridiculous suggestions.  If you and BF were not already living together, for whatever reason, why in the world would you agree to do it because of HIS finances?  It's not your job to subsidize him, and only a fool would move his SS into your home and bring on the BM drama.  You'd be nuts to do that even if he paid the full cost of your place, and NEVER if he just wanted to freeload.

And why is it that your BF can't take out his own personal loan?  Because he doesn't qualify?  If that's the case, then he's not a good credit risk, so why would YOU take that risk?  Has BF cut his expenses to the bone?  Has he gotten a second job?  That's what his financial advisor should be suggesting to him, not mooching off his girlfriend who has her own kids and retirement to finance.

I'd have said "you're kidding, right?" and then when he said "no" I'd have laughed so hard I'd have to pick myself up off the floor.

As for your friend, they'd be off my Xmas card list. My friends all have functional brains.

If he needs to save rent, then he needs a roommate. There are tons of people who need cheap places to live, so it should be easy to find someone.

Also, unless attorneys work differently where everyone else is, around here they won't work with you unless they are reasonably sure you can pay them back. I'm not saying $40,000 isn't a lot, but unless he is up to his eyeballs in debt elsewhere, I don't see why he can't take out his own loan to pay it off. That's about the price of a good new car, so it's not astronomical. If he owns his own home, he may also have enough equity to cash out. Or, and it's my least favorite option, he could pull funds from his retirement to cover the immediate bill and pays those back over the next 10-20 years.

Right now does seem like the perfect time to get a second job, too. Between the need for seasonal help and just workers in general, there are tons of jobs (at least around here).

I just wonder if his friend specifically said "move in with your GF and have her give you a personal loan" or if he said "cut down on your living expenses by finding a roommate or somewhere cheaper to live, and see if you have someone close to you who could float a personal loan at better terms than what you could currently get". 

Your BF is absolutely bonkers, though, if he thinks you're going to get more entangled in this drama after it impacted your job - your livelihood for you and your kids.

Speaking from experience, spending large sums of money won't stop alienation. We spent about 40K too. It racks up really quickly when attorneys charge $300/hr - and if you live in mortal terror of losing your kid, you tend to not care about the money. 
 

After this court round, your BF needs to drop the rope or break up with you to please BM (I don't advise the latter). But throwing money at lawyers won't solve this. Even if he wins this round there is nothing to stop her from continuing to withhold SS. 

*Wiping tears from my eyes for laughing so hard at the 'financial advisor's advice'."

WTF?  If your BF doesn't qualify for a personal loan of his own from a bank or lending institution, then he doesn't qualify for one from you!  If your boyfriend is broke, you'd never again see any money you "loaned" him.  JFC.  

Honey, no man is worth this much BS.  He's literally suggesting you jeopardize your and your kids' future and financial stability.  Think about that for a moment.  

Yeah, those in normal no-kid relationships don't get that you have to protect your finances for you and your kids and don't get not wanting to follow the "normal" relationship escalator of dating, falling in love, moving in, combining finances and living happily ever after. 

Stick to your guns. Sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders and your kids are lucky that you can see the red flags a mile off. 

What did your boyfriend think of this advice? Was he all for it - or did he see that while this may be good for him it would in no way be good for you?

Tell your BF that you consulted with your financial advisory group (that's all of us here). To a person, they all said this is a staggeringly bad idea.

Cutting expenses is good. Shifting the burden to another person is not. If he needs to rebuild savings, how is a loan going to help that? That makes no sense. A second job is a much better answer.