Hey All!

Things have been good on the SD front - we have a general understanding of each other and both have our own boundaries. It works well. This blog is more of a DH problem/complaint.

So due to covid, we haven't seen SD since December. Everytime we try to see her, there are travel restrictions and all other sorts of things. We are in New England, and she is in the south. I have plans to meet half way to pick up both SD and MIL for a visit next weekend and dropping them off a couple days later. This is not a covid discussion - we have mitigated risks and made appropriate decisions for our family and our work place in regards to 'outsiders' coming in to our 'covid crew.'

We originally chose driving because it's obviously the safest. MIL insisted on coming because 'she misses her babbbbyyyy' (whatever). MIL calls on Tuesday night asking if they could fly (she doesn't want to be in the car for 8 hours) and what are my thoughts. I said, this is a question for SD, DH, and BM, that it was their decision, not mine. Regardless of driving or flying, we have to quarentine for two weeks upon their departure, since they are coming from a 'hot' state. Well, MIL called DH and said she would prefer to fly. He immediately said he's not sure he's comfortable with that. In my 

Instead of just saying, I'm not comfortable with that, he sticks my sorry ass in the middle of it and says, "DadsWife - what are your thoughts, should they fly or drive?" and I said, I am not involved this isn't my decision to make. Well he then proceeded to get frustrated with me, calling me unhelpful, because I wouldn't make a decision for him. I told him to call BM, as it puts her house at risk too. So he did, and then when BM said she didn't feel comfortable either, so now he finally had someone to be his meat shield against MIL. Shockingly enough, MIL was fine with this decision and no drama ensued except for DH rant once it was over that I 'was rude by not answering his question.'

I will say, occasionally I get anxiety when thrown in the middle of things and can come off has a total bi***, but I know, for a fact, all I said was, they aren't my family and I don't feel comfortable putting my two cents in, this is your decision. So now I'm convinced he's mad with me because I wouldn't make the decision for him, which is ridiculous and absurd. I plan on talking to him this evening about how it is not appropriate to put a SO in the line of fire with your own family. I would never make him make a decision for anything regarding my family that could potentially get thrown back at him. 

This was more of a vent. Sorry guys. I get incredibly frustrated with this type of thing. He hates being the 'bad guy' but there was no bad guy in this scenerio, he just made it out that way. I get he doesn't like disappointing people, but that is his problem, not mine.