My Bf’s son has problems and he ANNOYS ME

To start off, Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all if you. I know the title sounds horrific. Trust me its not what it sounds like. Im a young single mother, my son is 3 years old. My bf has 3 childern with a baby momma from the PITS OF HELL. His daughters are perfect. One is 9 the other is 8. They are so well behaved. The son on the other hand is five years old. Doesnt speak, still uses pampers and has a HORRIBLE temper. Hits and bites people and his stupid little No's make me want to pick my stuff up and LEAVE. I have my own place. My bf is 28 and lives with his momma. His kids are here for visit and I have sacrificed time with my own son to watch over the 5 year old spawn of satan. This child cant come into contact with my son due to the fact that this kid might hit my kid and I swear TO GOD, I will raise satan himself from his throne. The kid has a very severe case of Autism. My son has it very light and I pay for him to see a therapist and correct any behavior. I tried to tell my BF that he needs to show his son right from wrong but it just turns into a fight and I feel like an evil stepmom. I really do care about his son because obviously his BM doesnt give a S***. Im at my wits end. Bf keeps asking me why I Dont bring my son around. Well... I dont want my son to act like yours & I need to protect my son from such an atrocious behavior. Im only 22. Please help me. His kids leave in 4 days but Im continuously looking at the calender. Please help me. I dont know what to do. This guy treats me the way ive dreamed to be treated. His son is RUINING EVERYTHING AND HE IS LOSING ME OVER THIS KID BRO

evil stepson stepmom

Dontcallmeabadmom's blog
Log in or register to post comments

Comments

Well for starters this guy

Well for starters this guy isn’t treating you like you dreamed to be treated. I doubt a disregard of your feelings and lack of obligation to his own child was part of your dream. And it’s a one package deal. That bit is as much a part of him as the part that makes you feel like a million bucks when you’re with him alone. His spawn’s lack of behavioural guidance is a reflection of him as much as BM. So up to you to decide if you can accept crappy parenting in a partner, not crappy behaviour in a skid.

End the relationship.

End the relationship. I hate to be so blunt, but that is the best thing to do for you and your son. You are 22 and have your whole life ahead of you. Your boyfriend is a terrible parent if he isn't getting his son any help. You need to protect your child and it is not safe for him to be around this boy.

Leave

1. Your boyfriend is using you as a baby sitter/nanny. He wants you to take over parenting.

2. You are young and nice and trying to be a good mom. This is to much baggage.

3. Hes a bad parent. It doesnt get better it gets worse. Its ok for him to lose you - you gain!

I have a 20 yr old SS with

I have a 20 yr old SS with Autism. His is considered high functioning however, even with that diagnosis, he won't likely to be able to live on his own.

You already have one child with ASD, yours is very HF and might be able to live a fairly "normal" life. Dealing with a lower functioning ASD kid is a life-long commitment. Imagine when he is bigger than you and still not fully potty trained. That was something I had to deal with. It wasn't that my SS couldn't, he just wouldn't. He doesn't like bowl movements. He would wait until he crapped his pants because he just didn't want to go. He doesn't like how it feels. He still has issues with that and I still have to monitor a 20 yr old and his poop schedule. Don't even get me started on things like showering (I have to smell his hair when he gets out to make sure he washed), brushing his teeth, etc.

You are 22. While this guy might be great in many areas, parenting a special needs child isn't one of those. That kid will be with you forever.. possibly in YOUR home- Forever. Do you get not being able to vacation alone without him? Having no date nights because he can't be left alone? He is 5 right now so it is easier to justify behavior and the need for supervision, but what are you going to do when he is 20? 30? 50? You and your BF could have to be his caregivers. Is that the life you want?

I love my SS20 very much. I am mom to him. He drives me crazy but we have a great support system with family and there are many things that my SS can do. However, I knew what I was signing up for with DH. He never hid or covered up or put on rose colored glasses. DH also fully has my back and doesn't push any of SS's needs on me. It is all what I want to do and what I chose to do. Do you see the difference?

Leave. There are no redeeming

Leave. There are no redeeming factors in this relationship whatsoever. You can't bring your son around and your BF won't correct his. Not entirely sure how you'll make a relationship work for the next 15+ years while your son is a minor.

Ultimately, you have a BF issue. It's HIS responsibility to make sure his son is parented. It's HIS responsibility to make sure his son gets treatment. He isn't doing that, and you're making the fatal mistake many women make by trying to "fix" something you didn't break and - spoiler alert - cannot fix even if you try. You don't have the rights to, literally.

So, wash your hands of this relationship. You're young. You can find a better partner - preferably one that parents their own kid(s).