Ha ha, how sad is it that my SD11's parents CAN'T STAND HER. They both have done so much damage they pawn her off. My SO stayed home with her as a baby so I know he loves her and sometimes that makes him such a f'n sucker for her bs but at the end of the day he says he wants to pack her off and dump her on BMs driveway. I used to blame BM for everything but I am seeing daddy dearest has more blame in the issue than he'd like to admit.

I think that DH has had enough of SD16 and can't stand to be around her. He says he gets very uptight when she is around because she is all weird and awkward and you can tell she is just waiting for the right time to ask for something. She lives with us so it sucks.

He says you cannot have a normal conversation with her. Her conversations always start with "I want" or "can you" so no one wants to be around her.

He says she is just like BM-greedy, mean, selfish and cares about no one but herself.

Now on the weekends he lets her stay at BM's mothers house from Friday night until Sunday. He says he doesn't think its a good idea for her to be hanging around there but he doesn't want her home bothering us all weekend!

Such a change from years ago when they were attached at the hip!

I dont believe either of my ss14's parents actually "like" him. I do think they both love him because he is their son, but actually "like" him, or enjoy spending time with him? Hell, no. On one hand somewhat sad, but on the other hand this is truly the most unpleasant human I've ever met. I know I personally tried hard to deny the fact for years and years-must be bm's fault, maybe it's dh's fault, hell, maybe it's mine-that ss is so damn unpleasant-it's this teachers fault, or that kid's fault, or the neighbor's fault that none of them get along with ss or pick on him. Finally, most people face reality. There is a common denominator with ss and ALL of his relationships and it is his him. We've got VASTLY different people interacting with him, but noone gets along with the kid. Noone.

So, yep, I absolutely agree that there are bio parents that dont like their own kid. Dh feels love for ss as he is his son, but no liking. He does not like his attitude, his choices, his behaviors. I too think he has felt this way for sometime, and felt horribly guilty for it, and would do things to try and "make up" for it, I think it is what drove him to move him back into our home earlier this year-he had to TRY to make it work-although I think in his heart he knew it wouldnt and it would be bad for everyone-but in the last year or so I really think dh has turned a corner and realized that it doesnt really matter what he does-ss is still who he is.

I'm so glad that someone posted about this. I totally believe it's true as well. I have a similar situation as those above, where both DH and BM(plus DH's mom, my family and friends, SD's teachers, other kids, etc.)honestly don't "like" SD13 even though they love her because she is their daughter.

BM doesn't like her personality because she is too clingy and jealous of her siblings, and won't help out enough around the house.

DH doesn't like her personality (he actually says she has no personality) because she repeats the same questions to him (since it's the only thing she can think of to talk to him about) and otherwise just tiptoes around our house like a little mouse and talks like a baby to him.

I don't like SD because of all of those reasons above, plus she lies non-stop and exaggerates to make herself a victim. Also, around me she never shuts up or leaves me alone (even to pee - seriously)...oh and she always walks around with her arms linked behind her back, like holding her elbows....wtf?

DH's mom doesn't like her personality because she's too needy and never shuts up.

My family and friends don't like her personality because she's very awkward, lurky and off-putting (Stuff like, "There's just something creepy about that kid. She looks, dresses, and acts like an 80 year-old woman. It's just weird." is what I hear most); plus she latches on to anyone who pays the slightest attention to her, even if they are basically a stranger (my cousin and sister have gotten this).

Teachers don't like her personality because she pretends to be stupid or to not know things so they will pay her extra attention (used to pretend not to know how to put on her coat or tie her shoes) - plus she's an annoying little suck-up who tells on everyone else and tries to be the perfect student and teacher's pet (I'm a teacher. Trust me, we hate these kids) so she stays after school to "help" but really just wants more attention from the teacher and won't leave them alone and so they get annoyed with her.

Other kids don't like her personality because she's a total creepshow. She looks, dresses, and acts like an 80 year-old woman (we're talking thick glasses, old-fashioned braid in her hair with a scrunchy or bobbles at the bottom, REALLY old-lady type clothes, mannerisms, interests (such as knitting and crocheting and Elvis - not really "normal" interests for a teen in our urban area), and repeats the same things over and over like an Alzheimer's patient). And when she does actually get a friend, she trips over her own feet (literally sometimes) trying to bombard them with toys and attention to the point that they feel suffocated (and she looks totally desperate) so they go play with someone else, which throws SD into a jealous rage.

So, it's definitely not just me. She rubs EVERYONE the wrong way, even her parents. No one can stand her for any length of time. I thought I would be able to bond with her more as she got older (I teach middle school - this age is actually my favourite) but I cannot relate to her at all and neither can anyone else! I feel bad for her in a way because she pushes everyone away from her and she doesn't understand why she has no friends or keeps getting passed around between family members. I wonder if it'll ever change...

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Me and my BD don't mesh well. As a baby she was colicky and looking back now, I had postpartdum. Not to the point of where I wouldn't take care of her, but I think it effected my bonding. I was depressed from her, depressed in my marriage. My head/memory is very very foggy from those beginning years.

We started to bond better in her toddler/preschool years and then the divorce. I had to work sooo much and her dad worked his PAS magic. The elementary years were strained. Now she is 13 and drives me nuts. We just aren't the same kind of "girls" yet at times we are. LOL I really feel like I have a really hard time relating to her, but at the same time (and not to use this as an excuse) I had NO "teacher" (a mother) to learn what a healthy mother/daughter relationship is about.

I love my daughter no doubt I do love her. Of course at times I don't like her, but I think in our situation is we just don't mesh well right now.

I actually suspect my dad didn't like me too much when I was a kid, but now that I'm an adult, we get along really well. Probably because I'm just the younger, female version of himself. I literally can't imagine ANYONE liking my skids, I could seriously not blame either DH or BM for not liking them at all. In fact, DH has said on more than one occasion, "I love my kids because their my DNA, but I seriously don't like them right now." I think the vast majority of parents have at least one point in their kids' lives when they just don't like their kids very much. Sometimes it's preschool, sometimes it's teenagers, some kids just suck altogether and are almost completely unlovable. Hate to say it.