And another thing..
Is it normal for a BM to text DH every week about something, I get when the topic is relevant, but it always seems like it is something irrelevant (like the sick cat). Sometimes it is just sooo annoying, even he gets annoyed. Like why does she have to text on a Friday evening at 9 or 10 at night, I keep saying to DH like where's her husband ?!?! I'll tell him does she like realize you aren't together anymore? I don't know I just know when I was in a relationship with someone and we broke up the last thing I wanted to do was talk to him. I get it, they have a kid, talk about the relevant stuff and leave the small talk for your hubby.
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You can't do anything about
You can't do anything about her texting. Is he responding and engaging when it's not something important about the kids? If so, that's your issue.
I didn't have this problem with BM thank goodness, but I did have an issue where DH would answer calls and texts from anybody, kids or friends or work or literally anybody. Addicted to that instant gratification and having other people's attention. I got tired of it, we'd argue, he'd promise, nothing changed. So I took action-- I would consistently leave the room, leave the table, and even leave a restaurant. He eventually got the point and it stopped.
He generally does not respond
He generally does not respond, but if he does not respond then she goes to me, so I've been trying to say just answer her even if it is one word because I'd rather not recieve the text too!! I really think it is just the attention and her trying to irritate him ... which is the part that does sometimes make me not so happy is because it creates stress for him.
Then HE needs to set and
Then HE needs to set and enforce that boundary with her. Tell her that he will NOT be responding, and neither will you, unless it is a relevant urgent matter. That doesn't mean she won't still blow up both your phones, but you don't have to continue to play her game.
Block her from your phone.
Block her from your phone. She has absolutely no reason to call you.
Toxic Troll the oversharer
Toxic Troll used to text about her personal life. Especially before we were married. He sais he would not respond, but Id ask him, and rather than tell me, he would show me the texts, and typically his one word response would illicit several badly spelled psuedo sentences. Stuff like "Im going away for the weekend with new guy. He treats me like a queen." Or like when she got her tax returns money, "can you please measure my living room? Im wanting to buy some new furniture, and will also need to borrow your truck".
Measure her living room? Wth?
Measure her living room? Wth? She doesn't know how to use a tape measure? And borrow his truck. Ah, no, rent a U-Haul. Toxic Troll indeed! Aptly named!
When I met DH, BM was calling
When I met DH, BM was calling him daily to talk about herself, complain about her life, or tell DH he was a terrible person. They had been divorced for over three years at that point and she was remarried, but she definitely still used DH for emotional support. Early on, I asked him, what, other than not living together, had changed in his relationship with his ex wife? I also told him that I had no interest in being involved with a man who was still in an emotional relationship with his ex wife. He quickly stopped talking her calls and limited his responses to things to do with skids...and then all hell broke loose with her, but that's a different story. Lol. She still periodically tries to reminisce with him and get sympathy, but now, nearly 8 years after we met and after a thorough parental alienation campaign from her, he doesn't care to hear from her at all, so he fully ignores her. She recently emailed him to say her life was hard because she had a cancer scare...too bad, so sad, BM, DH didn't even reply. Unless she has cancer and we have to take in the kids, he doesn't care. We have 1.5 years until skids are 18, then as far as DH is concerned, BM doesn't exist...
Crazy BMs
BM and DH used to text a lot when we first started dating. She was already pregnant by the next baby daddy and I found it odd she only texted DH at night when baby daddy was most likely asleep because he had to get up super early for work. DH finally told her to stop because she eventually stopped saying things like she msises the kids (he only had them three days a week) to "I miss when we would go four wheeling and go on trips." Lady....you got pregnant by another guy when you were still married. Like, what? She stopped after he had to tell her to talk to her husband and not him.