DH came through....another step in our journey
I had to have a tooth removed last week. Apparently, when our dog hit me in the face with his head about 5 months ago, he cracked my tooth vertically and just about knocked it right out of my head. I knew it was loose but I figured it would tighten up on its own. Yep..no....it needed to be removed and replaced with an implant.
OH FREAKING JOY...
So last week I was scheduled for the removal and the implant screw placement.
Rather than assume that DH knows he needs to be available and take care of me should I need it...I was upfront and direct this time.
I told DH a few weeks in advance.
DH, I don't know how this tooth removal is going to go. It could be nothing but it could also be painful for that first day or so. I need you to make me a priority. That is I need to be your main focus that day at the very least. I don't want to hear you have work, SD or anything Beaver related. I'm being upfront...and in the past you have not really been there for me when I had surgery etc.
*Back story.....about 5 years ago I had my thyroid removed. While Dh was here...he was distracted and my mom ended up taking care of me for the most part for the first few days. Then not even a week after the removal...I still had stitches, etc....GWR's drug us came to light and we had to deal with all of that. So I virtually got no healing time and DH was not the best at being attentive. He did step up a bit during that time when my calcium levels dipped so low that my muscles were contracting but that was because he realized I was about be admitted to the hospital etc.*
I still harbor restentment over the fact I couldn't have a week to recover before dealing with GWR and Beaver, etc.
I made my tooth appointment on a week we do not have SD and on a day SD does not work, just to be sure DH wouldn't be divided etc. Sure enough the day before my tooth removal...SD tells DH that she has to work the next day and can he take her to work.
SAY WHAT....DH tells SD..."well Halo has tooth removal tomorrow and I will see how she is feeling and maybe I can take you."
OH HELL TO THE NO THERE DH.....I told DH....I'm concerned that all SD heard was you will take her. She will not have another ride set up etc. "
DH thought a minute and said.."your right..she will just assume I'm taking her. Let me tell her to find another ride. I don't want to not be there for you again." AND HE DID JUST THAT. He told SD..he couldn't do and low and behold Beaver actually took her kid to work. Praise the diety you worship...its a freaking miracle.
DH was there for me all day the day my tooth was removed. He had soft foods available, looked up what all I needed to do to take care of the gapping whole..and made sure I was his priority. Gotta say...he really did step up this time.
So...it seems that therapy is working on both our parts...mine..I was very upfront with my needs...and DH paid attention to my needs and was there to meet them.