I had to have a tooth removed last week. Apparently, when our dog hit me in the face with his head about 5 months ago, he cracked my tooth vertically and just about knocked it right out of my head. I knew it was loose but I figured it would tighten up on its own. Yep..no....it needed to be removed and replaced with an implant.
OH FREAKING JOY...
So last week I was scheduled for the removal and the implant screw placement.
Rather than assume that DH knows he needs to be available and take care of me should I need it...I was upfront and direct this time.
DH had his conversation about school/grades with SD.
The Highlights from Wednesday's conversation..as I got from DH.
1. This year is HARRRDDDERRRR. DH told her yes...its harder its called your a Junior and it gets harder as you go.
2. Its just one class I'm failing. DH..nope its 3 so that leads me to think its something else outside of school affecting your grades.
Sigh....parenting is hard. Its really hard when you put ADD, DH and Beaver.
SD is now failing three classes. The algebra teacher wants to see DH, Beaver and SD to figure out how to get her back on track.
(Please note I am NOT included in this powwow)
DH is now pissed off, scared for SD and her future and is just well frustrated.
There have been several changes..
1. SD has a job. It is two times a week till 8 p.m. during the school week and 1 day on the weekend Honestly not that much, about 12 hours a week.
2. SD has a boyfriend.
Oh DH....you just keep trying to make me do your work.
DH needed to talk to SD about school and her grades, etc. He looked at me and said..
"Well you can talk to her tomorrow when she gets home from school."
Nope..not gonna happen there DH. I'm not your lackey and I'm not doing your dirty work anymore. I'm no longer a hit man for hire.
I looked at him and said..."No, you can talk to her. Not me."
We live close to a pretty decent amusement park. They have a TON of roller coasters and put on a pretty cool Halloween season. We have gone before, but haven't been for about 5 years. I LOVE roller coasters and Halloween. Back in June, DH got an email with this years packages..(cabin at the amusement park resort, tickets for the park, etc) and decided to book it for this year.
As I explained in therapy to DH..I have spent the last 15 years of marriage with a third person in our marriage..BEAVER. I was done with that. I neutered the Village Idiot (my ex) early at year 1 of my marriage to DH. I went scortched earth on the VI..went for full custody, etc. When the VI asked for a psyc eval...I said bring it and it ended with him being diagnosed as a narcissist and he was advised to give me what ever the eff I wanted as I was being resonable. Over the years I sacrificed monetary battles with him as I could swing things on my own and I didn't want to invite the VI
I have found this an interesting thing that DH does.
See..DH's complaint of me that is that I'm too controling. Mmmkay...that is true I can be. I'm working very hard to manage that and my anxiety, which is the root of the control issues. Part of that is disengaging from the Beaver/SD and DH triangle. I can't control or effect that mess so I have to let it go. *****deep breath***
THAT DRIVE YOU INSANE...
Bwahahahahhahahaaaaa....DH is really getting a taste of SD.
Dh has taken to spoiling me a bit..so I had a massage yesterday evening. I made dinner for DH and SD and myself before I left. DH ate his dinner with me and SD wasn't hungry yet. Ok...cool whatever. Off I go to the massage...90 minutes of heaven.
so...since Halo has realized that she was a door mat for the last freaking 15 years....and is no longer that door mat. DH has had to step up and take care of his kid ..by himelf. Favorite line..not my circus not my monkey.
Almost 6 months ago...my world came crashing down around me. Discovery Day (D-Day)was certainly an eye opening day.
Ah...so as many know...after much thought I decided to give DH a chance to make things right with us and to move forward and stay with him.
This was done with the knowledge that I would try to reconcile and that I would give myself permission to walk if I thought DH wasn't putting in the work to make things right.