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Update on the birthday party Saga

imagr8tma's picture

Well, after having DH told by BM to give up his visitation weekend for a birthday party. We tried to get her to give us the details so that we could just show up early and take sd since it was so important.

Of course she did not reply to any of my DHs texts or emails after he told her he would not give up his entire weekend for the birthday party.

SO we got on the road and drove from VA (4 1/2 hours) to NC getting there at 6pm. Called and hoped that we could have at least taken SD ourselves to the party or pick her up for the visitation as stated in the court order.

She lies to DH stating there is traffic and she would not be able to meet him until 8pm, then hung up. Okay we know were not supposed to be there until 630 but what was she thinking.

We were there - there was no traffic. She was not at her home - she actually drove to the birthday party which was almost 30 minutes away. So we drove to the original meeting point which was 1.5 hours back towards VA.... and waited until after 8pm.

In the interest of not fussing in front of SD - we just picked her up - and left. She then immediately starts telling us of how the birthday party was and how her mom said on the telephone to some one that over her dead body would she allow DH to take her to the birthday party just so it would make him look good.

We didn't discuss it with SD. We just asked her about the party and she seemed to have had a great time. It was at a place called girl's world.

BUT DH did text BM and tell her that was just horrible to say something like that and to have us wait 2.5 hours when DH could have taken her and gotten back on the road. She proceeds to tell him that she didnt lie about traffic, that she was there waiting on I-95 for 3+ hours, and that he was the lier as always.

We just laughed at that one. Hell what else could we do. We went to dinner and sat and talked until she showed up. I don't know what else we can do to keep the peace with her. BUT we do have a court case coming up for custody in July and we are praying hard to help keep our peace until that time.

After lying and making us wait until after 8pm to pick sd up - she then texts DH at 7 am to tell him she wants him on the road by 930 am so she can get daughter at 11. We both just laughed. He sent her back a text stating the court order states 4 pm on Sundays. AND although he always meets her early so they are not driving and tired on Sunday - He decided not to do it.

We went to church and enjoyed our "family sunday dinner" and then got on the road. When we pulled up - she was furious. BUT hey, we missed out on that time on Friday due to not getting back home until after sd was asleep.

GEEZ court can not get here soon enough.

Comments

BridgingTheGap's picture

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imagr8tma's picture

My mouth dropped. I really didn't know what to say and neither did DH. I mean - a birthday party is not that serious at all.

After all we drove 4.5 hours to try and take her and basically got stood up for an additional 2.5 hours. So i am still trying to understand why BM was angry.

It is just amazing to me. To even say, Over my dead body, in reference to sd dad taking her to a party. WHAT>!>!>!>!>!>!

I am so tired of trying to figure this women out.

MiseryNMissouri's picture

Sounds like my husband's ex...i hope all goes well for you in court...i will be praying for you girl..i feel your pain, i went thru the same thing with my husbands ex...i am not on here a lot and i just get so down reading the stories...it should be about the kids...but since i knew the ex hated me that just made me love my DH even more...i know i am preaching to the choir because you seem like you got it all together, but make sure when you go to court you and your DH have everything documented and make sure you are on the same page, and that you portray a loving relationship for the court...i mean stuff like this can tear a marriage apart, its already hard enough to be married to a man (sorry guys but you know we are emotional, LOL) and to have someone attacking your family is the last thing we need...Girl, pray, because the devil will not win in this situation...Love you DH, stand by his side and have him stand by yours...my DH benefits from our situation greatly because the madder i get about his ex the more i love him in everyway and that is how i take out my anger by loving my DH even more...(he loves it)...i told my husband no matter how mad i may get at him sometimes, i love him and will be with him for better or worse, so dont let that BM win....use your frustration and anger and turn it into good for you and your husband...he wont know what hit him and you can smile, because everytime you are with your husband just know it pisses her off and every time you and DH are at odds it only feeds the BM Devil..

Keep us posted....

imagr8tma's picture

Thanks so much for your comment. It is exactly what i needed to hear after this weekend. I do feel the same way - but it is good to have reinforcement from you on that.

Thanks again.

MiseryNMissouri's picture

Girl, we are a family on here...i tell you that is why i dont come on hear often because it just pisses me off....but like i said i will not let these BM win, i take my anger out on my husband through love.....because i know i may be a little crazy but every time i am with my DH there is a part of me that believes i am sticking it to her, again my DH loves it but he doesnt know why, he thinks its him (bless his heart, LOL)...hell just reading your entry, i cant wait until he comes home from work...its on...LOL......these BM can consume your emotional side and it will eat you alive...so i pray about it and love my DH even more...dont give up and dont give in, love your DH no matter what...do it the midwest sytle, put it on him and he will not know what hit him....and them smile and say in your mind (B, take that)....LOL...