I don't know if DH calls BM, but he has lots of "top secret" calls with SD24. It's nauseating. I swear, if he could legally have sex with her and make her the wife, he'd do it. She is sooooo the "other woman" in this relationship!

I've been through this for five long years. It was such a horrible experience. Whenever my husband didn't parent properly and his ex would call, he'd have to talk secretly with her. The result was that it was always MY fault. The last straw was when I heard him whisper "Hold on, I can't talk right now, she's here". I lost it!!

Fast forward years later and their son is behaving VERY badly because of always excusing his bad behaviour as my fault instead of parenting him. Biological mom shocked me by calling ME to ask what's going on and in the process she sees now that it's their father's lack of parenting and making excuses that is causing all the problems. We talked for two hours on the phone. She also tells me all the reasons why she left him...lol.

You should have seen my husband! He was LIVID. He kept walking in the room, trying to listen to our conversation. I did what he always did to me which was to lower my voice and walk away. He was FURIOUS!! This happened a week ago and he's still raging about me talking to his ex.

With a smile on my face, I just replied using his words to me when he always did this, "What? Why does people talking and whispering about you bother you?? You should be more mature about this and think of the kids".

DH goes outside any time he's on the phone with anybody - it's a courtesy thing. He gets LOUD. Also, if he's on the phone with BM, I don't want to hear her loud screeching through his phone.

He always tells me everything anyway, so I'm not at all paranoid. But then, I do have a DH who (mostly) stands up to BM and ALWAYS includes me, so there's no question I'm first in his eyes.

As far as emails go - I blind carbon copy EVERY email I send to SD15; he deserves to know what his daughter is up to, and if BM were to try to start crap over me emailing SD15, he already knows the content. I never get Cc:ed on his emails to BM, but that's fine. My relationship is with SD15 - it's his job to keep BM out of our lives.