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Disengage or play up the part ?

June's picture

Submitted by June on Mon, 11/15/2010 - 8:11pm

So I'd really like to hear from you stepmoms that have your skids BM living within driving distance from you. What I need to know is how meny of you in this situation see BM on a regular basis? I've been with my now DH for about 7 years and it just occured to me that I've only actually seen BM face to face a couple of times. We've talked on the phone briefly but basically that's it. I know allot of people(stepmoms) talk on a regular basis to BM but my on the days that we get the skids my DH picks up the skids straight from his work so I don't see her then. He drops them off on Sunday night and I'm useally in my pj's by then so I don't go. I don't have any issues with her to speak of, were civil to each other when we do talk. This just recently struck me out of the blue as possibly being out if the norm. The other night we happened to be out late with the skids at the movies and after we got out it was time for skids to go home and DH droped me off at home first, then droped off skids ( we only live 15-20 min apart) When he got back home I asked him why he did that and he said he didn't really put allot of thought into it, he just figured I wouldn't want to go along. Does anybody else have this sort of relationship with their skids BM and do u think it's strange?

Comments

etyler's picture

Submitted by etyler on Mon, 11/15/2010 - 8:22pm

I think that it all depends on how you feel. For me, I cannot stand BM but I think that is important to be there to support SD and not shy away from the situation.

It really depends on who you are and who they are. I know some who legally aren't allowed to go with..

if you feel comfortable go, if you don't then don't.
All in all, don't make it a bigger deal than it needs to be.

SillyGilly's picture

Submitted by SillyGilly on Mon, 11/15/2010 - 8:23pm

Good grief I think you have an IDEAL relationship Smile Our BM is 15-20 minutes away. The only time I see her is at a skids sports event, band concert, ect... We switch after school on Mondays so we don't have to go to each others house for drop offs. For holidays when we have to go to one another's house the kids just hop out of the car. Thankfully our area is large enough there are multiple grocery stores so I don't worry about it but sometimes I worry about seeing her in Target. I would probably do something super lame like go put something expensive in my cart and buy it (returning it later) just to make her mad. I've never done that - or even seen her at Target - but I would totally waste my time doing something to irritate her!! Blum 3

June's picture

Submitted by June on Mon, 11/15/2010 - 8:34pm

LOL sillygirl. You crack me up! I would prob. do something lame o like that also. Thanks everyone for your coments. I was starting to feel strange reading all these blogs that talk about stepmom talking with BM. I just have no intrest. I care about skids and am supportive but not really looking to make friends with BM if ya know what I'm sayin.

sixteensmom's picture

Submitted by sixteensmom on Mon, 11/15/2010 - 8:36pm

Never see bm and she lives ten miles away.
We've had graduation parties she refused to attend, didn't even go to her daughters college graduation because I'd be there. Ss high school grad she hid in the back and we didn't see her. She has never been to our house. Dh picked up and dropped off for every visit till all the kids drove. In eight years I think I've seen her in person peering through the curtains or across an auditorium three times.

I see xh and his new wife often, used to be weekly when our kids were still in school. We all went out for dinner after most kid events. My dh bought xhs truck and I see his wife at my doc office all the time.