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Last-Wife's picture

I won't go into a lot of details, but after a truly great visit with Princess this week, things totally fell apart tonight. We had a family gathering with everyone here, since over the course of the next week there are 3 birthdays in the family. Princess got angry before everyone arrived. She wanted to go back to school early tonight, to a party, and we told her no. She left in a huff anyway, later telling Loghead she was going to town to get a birthday card...

Party was fine; she had a great time and was pleasant with everyone. She said to me 3 times that she really wanted to leave tonight, and I told her no, especially since dorms are still closed and there's a snow storm coming in...

The minute family left, Loghead went to talk to her about a few things, serious things, and she flipped out. It was bad. Screaming, cursing, she hit him. It went on for about 5-10 minutes. We left her room to let her calm down and then she came to find us and started it back up again about 10 minutes later. Then it got even uglier... Continued cursing; screaming, turned on me and started blaming me for everything that is wrong in her life. She took a swing at me, and Loghead stepped in and grabbed her arm. And then she REALLY lost it.

It was the absolute worst thing I have ever experienced in my life. I can't even describe it, or think of a movie reference to tell you what it was like... It was unreal. And I have seen many unreal fits in my role as SM...

Loghead was ready to call the police or the local mental hospital. Instead, he called his brother to come get her. She's at her aunt and uncle's right now. She has no phone, no computer, no car keys. She's supposed to go back to school tomorrow. Loghead says unless she can talk to him like an adult, and begin to make amends, he will be driving her up to school and leaving her, rather than her taking her car.

I'm just heartbroken. We have had such a good week! The girl I got to be with this week is MY Princess, the girl I know. And this just came out of left field. I can't help but think it's a tantrum like Loca Grande would throw- it screams bi-polar to me. And I'm scared for her.

This is gonna be bad... I think really bad. Sorry this is so vague, but it's not really my story to tell. I really am a bystander in this one, and it's like I just have to stand back and watch the train wreck. And again be prepared to pick up whatever pieces are left...

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Leigh's picture

Wow, how awful. I too wonder if this is my future. Many psychological disorders don't emerge until late teens-early 20s, like bipolar and schizophrenia. I see lithium in her future.

So sorry, and take care of yourself!

Last-Wife's picture

Her university does offer counseling, but we are looking into a private company associated with one closer to our home as well. That way she can have a therapist that works in both offices, so we can have some family sessions as well during the summer months when she is home.

A lot of it is her mother. But I still wonder about the bipolar too- which is her mother's issue, so Princess does have the genetic tendencies for it. She literally just snapped, and it was like a whole other person. And later, she really had no recolection of what she said or did...

This is "my" child, I have loved and raised since she was 5. On another blog about this incident, someone suggested it was time to disengage, but this is now when she needs me most. I did tell her, and Loghead, this morning that the next time gets heated and she wants to start making threats about "disowning" me or being "done" that that will be it. I won't do it again, but as long as she is open to our help and realizes our actions are out of love and concern for her, I can move on.

I later heard Loghead tell her she'd better not f-up again, because "you know Last-Wife means every word she always says. you want to throw away the one real woman who ever really loved you and raised you? Be careful..." he advised.

She left in tears, but more happy just knowing we were going to work with her... she's even called three times tonight to just check in with me and ask me little questions about things... She knows she messed up, even if she doesn't really seem to remember all of what she said or did...