There, I said it. A recent post of mine had a lot of people commenting because they couldn't believe I let Loca Grande in our house. Let me explain why I let that crazy bitch in...

I do it because I love my skids. If I want them to learn how to properly treat people, no matter whether we see eye to eye or not, I have to set the example for them. Honestly, when I became a step-mom nearly 14 years ago, it never dawned on me not to let her in. She never had been in my husband's apartment- he was afraid she'd claim "rape" and give detailed descriptions of the apartment, so he never let her in when he was single and raising the kids.

When we got engaged, and moved into a place together two months before our wedding, I wanted her to see that the skids had a good, safe, warm, loving place to be. I knew on weekends when they were with her (Loghead has always had primary phyisical custody), the three kids shared a room- the boys even shared the same bed! (They were 3,4, and 6 at the time.) They were so excited about their new bedrooms and wanted to show off the new house. I let her in...

And my door has always been open. It's like my mom used to always say, "Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer." At least if she's in my house, visiting the kids, I know what's going on. Oh, I'm not totally open minded and open hearted- you can better believe I knew just which air vents were best for eavesdropping... But yes, Loca Grande has had sleep overs with the kids over the years, in each of the four homes they have lived in over the years. She's not stable in any way, and never has any money. Sometimes the only way for the kids to see her was to invite her in for a pizza and movie night. And whether I like her or not, she is their mother, and sometimes they needed to see her, even if it was just so I could get a few minutes to myself. So yes, there have been evenings when I was at the kitchen table, grading papers, while she was snuggled on my couch watching TV with the kids, and coming in at commercials to pop popcorn. We've had BBQs together here- God, I'd never eat at her house! Just the thought makes me cringe! Her nieces and nephews have been here for play dates. We've been to funerals together for her family and Loghead's family. We've gone back to school shopping together, we always went to Parent Conferences together.

In my family gallery of photos, one of the pictures I am most proud of is from Princess's graduation day, taken in my living room. Princess is center in the picture. On one side of her is Loghead, Lazy Boye 16, PITA 17, Gibby 10, my parents, Loghead's parents, and Auntie L. On the other side of Princess is Loca Grande, her husband, Gullible, and Loca's mother and brother.

We did that. We raised that child togehter. It wasn't always easy... The kids know she is not allowed in the house if Loghead or I are not home. The skids are 20, 17 and 16 now. They don't even really "want" to be around her anymore, but she is their mom... And I hope someday they realize how lucky they are that I allowed their mother in our home, and to be part of the "family."

And I'm not all "goody-two shoes." Yes, Loghead and I usually have a good laugh about her later. In the graduation picture? Her make-up with blue eyeshadow and green mascara would rival Mimi, on the Drew Carey Show! And just this morning, she referred to wireless internet as "stringless." Sometimes I just have to laugh at the crazy, stupidity she brings to my life. And each time, I remember to thank God for leading Loghead and the skids to me, to rescue them from the crazy...