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Why does it bother me so much?

Leigh's picture

Submitted by Leigh on Sun, 11/21/2010 - 5:44am

That when SD13 is asked about her family, she claims to have 4 brothers and 1 sister. Two of the siblings are her SF's kids, her SB15 and SS9. Her SB she sees fairly regularly when she visits BM-maybe once or twice a month, but her SS (both of them have different BMs-he has 3 kids, 3 moms)has an intellectual disability, was never legitimized so SF never has never felt the need to be a part of her life, he almost went to jail for not paying CS, SD13 has only met her 2x, and SS9 has lived in TX (we live in GA) for over a year, and SF just found out about it. She is living with grandparents. And she doesn't call them stepbrother/stepsister, they are "brother and sister"... But she definitely calls me stepmom.

I know I shouldn't care, but it just sounds icky. And my jealousy makes me contemplate why she feels such allegience to them, and so little towards us.

Comments

Leigh's picture

Submitted by Leigh on Sun, 11/21/2010 - 5:47am

Oh, btw, her SS is 9 and her HB (is that how we abbreviate half brother?) on her BM's side is also 9... Probably explains why he has little to do with her! }:)

caregiver1127's picture

Submitted by caregiver1127 on Sun, 11/21/2010 - 7:32am

You know at 13 she is just trying to piss you off - it is the perfect age for girls to terrorize their mothers - so really take it as a compliment - if she liked you then she would not consider you a parental figure in her life at all she would consider you friend or Dad's nice wife. Think back when you were that age it was not easy and you probably only had your bio siblings to deal with - what you are describing sounds like a tame episode of Jerry Springer - lol

Plus if you ever see FB - all the kids have like 20 brothers and sisters - they all consider themselves family no matter who the parents are!!

SillyGilly's picture

Submitted by SillyGilly on Mon, 11/22/2010 - 8:49pm

Is it possible her mother pushes the "one big happy family" theory at her house ? I know my SD claims her stepsiblings at her mom's as "brothers and sisters" - and BM and baby daddy aren't even married so they aren't even "step" anything!!!! Plus, I think it can be easier to explain to strangers. It's hard for kids to get into the nitty gritty of who is who - especially when there are MULTIPLE birth parents! Does your SD reference you when she speaks about her "parents" ?