I've been reading blogs about gaining custody. Is it that lengthy, messy, expensive, exshusting and to gain maybe not helping these kids. What is better?

My BF & I know damb well these girls are in trouble in more ways then one. For example, the 14 year old is a self proclaimed lesbian, sexually active, failing 8th grade for the 2nd time, is allowed to smoke in front of the BM, gets to go the the mall & concerts with friends and has threatened her sisters. 2 weeks ago she & her girlfriend talked the 9 year old into climbing out the window and the kid slid off the porch roof! Thank God she is ok.

If we even dared to go for custody, BM would go clear off the deep end. She is not stable at all. She has disappeared twice before with the girls for weeks at a time. Hiding out at an abuse shelter.

At least for now, we can see and talk to the girls.

Anybody else out there tossing around this type of coin?