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What is wrong with this kid???

lizajane's picture

Submitted by lizajane on Mon, 03/04/2013 - 3:00pm

:jawdrop:

SS is 11. He talks like a baby when he is around his dad. Around anyone else it's normal 11 year old boy talk and behavior. Because of distance (thank goodness) he doesn't visit often, however when he does, he is constantly clinging and hanging on to his dad. It's pathetic and revolting. He will jump up in his dad's lap and throw his arms around his neck, and bury his face in his shoulder. He always wants to reminisce about when he was a baby, or when he was little. Last summer (very long miserable 45 days) out of the blue he burst into sobs saying he just wanted dad and bm to get back together. Dad replied with a plain and simple "That's not happening. Ever.". I have a 28 year old son and 26 year old daughter and neither of them has ever behaved this way at anytime during their childhood.

Comments

Journey1982's picture

Submitted by Journey1982 on Mon, 03/04/2013 - 3:29pm

I don't think anything is wrong with your SS. I think he misses his dad. Some of his behavior may seem strange to you, but he could be acting that way because he doesn't see his dad often. So when he does see his dad, he clings and hugs all over his dad. He just misses his dad. As for the baby talk, that would drive me nuts, because I hate for any child, regardless of age, to purposely talk like a baby.

RedWingsFan's picture

Submitted by RedWingsFan on Mon, 03/04/2013 - 3:31pm

How often does he see his dad? How long have dad and mom been divorced/separated?

step off already's picture

Submitted by step off already on Mon, 03/04/2013 - 4:01pm

My situation is a bit different in that DH has been SS13's primary caregiver for most of his life. It was just the two of them for the past 7 years and BM was basically out of the picture entirely other than the occasional once a month/every 6 month drunken visit.

If we are all out as a family with my 3 kids and him, if me and DH hold hands, SS13 will come grab DH's other hand. My DH isn't real fond of holding his 13 year old son's hand but he will for a minute. SS13 sees us show any affection and he will come up to DH and ask for a hug or if he loves him.

It blows my mind that a 13 year old boy is so insecure in regards to his father's love. This is a man that has committed his life to raising and providing for this boy.

I ran some errands this weekend and come home to find DH sleeping on the couch, with SS13 snuggled up next to him with his head on his dad's shoulder. It's just odd and wrong to me.

But many times skids are so emotionally messed up (either by Mom's PAS, abuse they've witnessed, words they've heard, etc, etc) that these are the way they deal with it. They need constant reassurance.