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Didn’t know BM had a say on my wedding

Momof6WI's picture

So for obvious reasons we had to make changes to our wedding due to the pandemic. We planned on a very small ceremony with just a few guests. 6. Because that is all that was allowed at the time. Since then the mandate has been lifted and were allowed more, not many more but more family can attend. We decided on letting the four older kids participate, my BD20, BS16, BS13 and SD11. We decided on not having SS5 and SS3 attend the ceremony so other family members can attend such as parents and grandparents. We both come from blended families ourselves so that puts us at our limit right there lol. Well BM dropped Skids off today and almost immediately after her leaving the house, future hubs gets a text from her stating how crappy it is that they won't be included in our special day and SS5 was so excited to dance. 
 

I'm not dumb, this has nothing to do with skids hurt feelings and everything to do with her being a twat-waffle and trying to sabotage the day. Future hubs replied back "it's none of your business". Which was followed by numerous texts to me saying she wasn't trying to be a shitty person and blah blah blah. I didnt respond back. 
 

I'm looking forward to next week and sometime later this summer we will have a reception and be able to include everyone we did not include during the ceremony. ❤️

 

Comments

strugglingSM's picture

My SSs went to our wedding. They were 10 at the time. One had a great time and the other was miserable and sat in the corner not saying anything to anyone. Having kids at a wedding is fine if they have parents who can manage them, but if their parent at the wedding is the one getting married, then sometimes it's better for them not to be there.

Sounds like BM is just having her own temper tantrum. Is she bitter that your future DH is getting remarried?

DHsfamilyfromhell's picture

Do not attempt this with very small children. 

A few years ago i had an informal wedding vow renewal (just for fun) so the kids could take part in something they missed out on. It was just us two, two small kids. And someone with a great sense of humour to do a quick ‘ceremony’! Lol. It was carnage, but great fun. Not to be attempted or recommended for an actual wedding. 

MissK03's picture

You are planning a reception so everyone could be there who missed out on the ceremony. So it's not like your excluding the young skids. My younger brother does not remember my fathers 2nd wedding (he was around 5) I was 10 and only remember small pieces. I remember both my brothers 8,5 at the time crying in the corner LOL. BM needs to mind her own business. 
 

BM here got remarried last summer. The skids found out the day AFTER when she sent pics. SD13 (then 12) brought this up to me a few months later. It hurt her. Her mom was getting married and she would have wanted to be included in the activities that go along with that. She was 12 though not 3/5. If skids were that young they wouldn't even understand or remember.  Not sure who else was there at BMs wedding. (Something small from the info I gathered) Not sure if they had something here later on as a reception thing. (They got remarried about 3/4 hours away) I honestly don't think the boys cared at all.  

momjeans's picture

Good for you guys! And you're absolutely right - this is allllll about BM.

DH and I got married locally and on the fly. Just a couple of friends, our littles (newborn and 18month old at the time). It was the middle of summer, while skid was here for visitation and she was NOT there. She was almost 8 at the time. When skid returned home, she must have told BM that daddy and momjeans got married, because BM sent DH a long and wordy rant about how skid cried in the backseat how she wasn't included in our wedding. It was classic BM.