Not this crap again...
So I got a call from DH a little bit ago and he said that BM called him this morning telling him all about how SD is shaking and crying because she doesn't want to come to his house after school today. BM said SD said she was scared to tell DH. BULLSHIT! I call bullshit because SD did this a few weeks ago and then told the truth after not coming over Thursday threw Saturday and cried to DH on Sunday about how much she missed him!
I am so sick of this crap. If SD wants to stay at her moms, then she should just say "hey dad, I want to stay at moms this weekend". I am sick of all the lying and the chain yanking that gets done by this stb8 year old! After BM throws this in DH's face, she changes her story and said "well, I guess that I won't be home until late tonight so SD can just go to your house and maybe I will get her Sunday". Fuck that you dumb cow! Sunday is OUR family day and you are NOT taking it from us! DH told her fine, if SD doesn't want to come then he isn't going to make her (stupid on his part IMO). I think the problem is that BM started to go to night school this last Tuesday and hasn't spent any time with SD this week. BM's mom (grammy) has been doing all the mothering of SD this week, so SD probably really does miss her mom.
He told me if she does end up coming, not to say anything to SD about going to Columbus next weekend because she isn't going to pull the shit about staying with whichever parent will be having more "fun" that weekend. If she chooses not to come next weekend then that is on her and we aren't changing our plans because of it!
The saddest part about all of it is that I feel a little relieved that she may not be coming this weekend. I am pissed as hell at all of this last minute bullshit, but also, I would LOVE to have a weekend just for me and my girls and DH.
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oh, I know. Out of my hands
oh, I know. Out of my hands though. She will end up being a spoiled, entitled brat just like her mother is. Always running home to mama when the going gets tough. Ugh
Who put the kid in charge?
Who put the kid in charge? Way to young I think to be given control over visitation even at 14 I told my dd (now almost 18) she was going to her dads unless she could #1 give me good solid a reason and #2 call her dad and tell him herself and tell him why, and if she wants a permanent change she has to tell it to a judge.
This has worked just fine and there have been times where she stopped going and I continued to push her to at least have a dinner or coffee time with him, and others where she just had plans she wanted to do with me. She's almost an adult since she isn't willing to tell a judge she doesn't want to do visitation with her dad she will go till she's 18.
A judge won't even listen to an 8 year old unless it's something horribly serious so why is your DH?
Because he has the "I don't
Because he has the "I don't want to push her away more by making her come" syndrome. It doesn't help that BM is a dumb, dumb who listens to everything SD tells her and doesn't EVER question any of it. BM is the one who told DH that SD will end up hating him for making her go. DH, himself, as a kid was forced to go spend time with a parent and now he still hates to go and see them. I wish BM were more like you because if she were, then SD wouldn't have an issue. SD thrives from attention, especially when people are "babying" her. So if you feed into her shit, then she will carry it way far. The sad part is that in a few days, SD will tell the truth, that she was lying about being afraid of her dad. This is exactly how it happened last time too. SD's councelor even told BM, DH and SD then SD had seperation anxiety from her mother because BM has moved around like a gypsie over the last few years. Councelor told DH and BM ways to cope with it and gave SD a means to get past it, but none of them seem to remeber any of that this morning. Kinda funny huh... oh wait... no it is not!
It shouldn't be the child's
It shouldn't be the child's choice. And it also shouldn't be the parents' choice either.
The judge issued a CO, I assume, in this case. Everyone involved needs to follow the order to a T. That's why the judge issues the CO.
Otherwise, I think it is like one parent saying it is OK if the child smokes pot. The other parent doesn't think that's right. Well, it IS against the law so the child shouldn't be doing it regardless of who thinks it is right or wrong.
I wished they made COs more like LAWS. Otherwise, all it is is a waste of time and resources for every single person involved.
No CO. 50/50 agreed upon when
No CO. 50/50 agreed upon when they split. Never married. No CS