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Blessings: a recap of the journey after I left Ex H....

October8's picture

I have been reading many of the tales of heartbreak and break up and my heart goes out to you. Yet there is hope and In this blog I hope I am able to share a little of it.

When I married my ExH I did so like may of you, in love, defending him to my own shadow, putting myself in the background of a relationship that was obviously damaging to me.

He had a son, a Bm and his own demons. I chose to be positive about the BM and the son until constant contact became worrisome. Like many, he also experienced a period where he wasn't working and I was footing all the bills.

He bacame possessive, angry, jealous, mean. I came to discover he was talking to other women/or more than talking. I left when he said he would go to the police to say I hit him. I called the police that day myself to protect my integrity.

The officer, a male, looked at me and said "you will be back, women always are" Little did he know......

That my destiny was not there.

That was 8 months ago. 8 months that seem eternally gone. And after the hurt, the insomnoa filled nights ot would haves and should haves. the joke of my 6 month marriage is like a distant nightmare and now I am OK.

More than OK in fact.

I went to and continue going to counseling. After 7 months of roomating with my BFF, I am back at my house.

My brother has helped me tremendously in remodeling it and it is getting to be a fabulous looking house. I got a painter to paint all the interior for $400.

I got a raise.

And I have a boyfriend with no kids and no drama. And, who just ADORES me. (I like him a lot too).

So after the hell came the blessings. Stay strong ladies, (((hugs)))

Comments

I_GOT_THIS's picture

Very inspiring.
thank you

God will forgive me. It's his job.
~~Heinrich Heine

October8's picture

My counselor says that now I will always listen to that voice inside myslef that tells me when something is wrong. You will too.

One can only hope!

Stick's picture

October 8 - GREAT STORY!!! I know that your hurt and insomnia filled nights were agonizing to go through... but WOW! It was worth it, eh? I am sure you are 10x stronger today than you were 8 months ago.

Congratulations!! I'm so happy for you.

Happy Thanksgiving girl!! Smile

*** A rainbow just threw up on me... and now I'm sh*tting glitter! ***

October8's picture

Stick, thank you.

Not only am I stronger I am different. While I was upfront before about my wants and needs, now I am more clear.

I have become a person who is determined to saty happy and I am more willing to let relationships that aren't healthy go.

I am also more sane. I no longer think I am crazy and I have tons of FAITH TO ME!

One can only hope!

ChaiLatte's picture

That's wonderful! I'm so happy for you. It's always great when someone gets a happy ending. Learning from past mistakes an not repeating them can be very hard. Just goes to show you it can be done. Smile

"There comes a time when you have to surrender the idea of what your children could be to the reality of who they are."

October8's picture

the hardest thing was staying away. With time and counseling I saw my relationship with XH for what it was, and now you couldn't pay me to go back.....

One can only hope!

hereandnow's picture

October8, thank you so much for posting your story - including pain, blessings, and all! It is such an inspiration! I really needed to hear your story today as I am still going through the aftermath of hurt, insomonia filled nights and would haves and should haves. Thanks to you, I know it gets better....I already feel stronger.
H&N

October8's picture

it's a day by day thing. But we are more resilient tahn we think sometimes. (((hugs)))

One can only hope!

GiGi222's picture

October,
Congrats on your progress. I am so happy that you are on this journey of reflection and change. Please keep us posted and let us know how you are doing Smile

October8's picture

The BF is fantastic.... and moving back to the house is an adjustment I am embracing!

One can only hope!