Is SD out of highschool? If not be prepared for it to continue. My SS turned 18 but was still in school so his reign of terror over my house continued until graduation day.

I used to think this way too, then I thought, there's graduation, college issues, financial issues even though it's not CO, the skids getting married, the skids having kids, funerals still for relatives..........I had to come to the reality that BM will be in my life FOREVER. For me, of course I would rather her not be, nothing personal to her, it's just nice to be the only woman in your SO's life, but accepting this fact makes it alot easier.

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“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.”

My SS is 19 now and keeps messing up. When his BM called to complain DH told her "He's an adult now, he's only acting how you raised him, its your problem now, leave us alone" Its been quiet for months. DH is over the guilty dad phase and knows we can't afford to buy love.

Not sure I agree middlemom. Yes, will have to deal w/BM at big events and such, but other than that, should be a lot easier going ---if not other reason than they can't file motions every few months. I am all cheers for you OVERIT----I know I will sigh a breath of relief when my last SD turns 18, and she will still be in HS---in fact, she will probably move in with her BM, but maybe not, and still, it will be different as she made the decision. Bm can't take us to court for ANYTHING regarding ANYTHING. YEAHHHHHH

I am so thrilled for you, overit! I'm new to ST so I'm not sure how long you've been waiting for this moment, but savor it! Here in NY, the law requires payment of CS to BM until skids are 21!! Unless you can prove legally they become emancipated - which is very difficult unless they literally get married young & move out! ahhhhh My skids are SD15 and SS12 and I feel like I'll be waiting FOREVER for the moment you're at now. We constantly have to worry about the skids a/k/a news reporters telling BM about anything we buy, big or small, and whether or not BM will go to court to increase CS. Can't wait to be free of it all. Congrats overit!!

I mention to SS "when you turn 18, you will be an adult...." He's SEVEN so we have 11 years to go. CS ends when he turns 18, which will be a couple months into his senior year of high school.

When DH's oldest son turned 18 (he'll be 30 next April), the BM (a different one than the one *I* get to deal with!) swore up and down that DH was responsible for CS until son graduated from high school. DH told her, "Read the decree and custody agreement. WHEN he turns EIGHTEEN, however, as a courtesy, I *WILL* send the same amount of CS until he graduates from high school." (2 months more than legally required.)

He wrote this in a letter to the BM. The son read the letter addressed to the mother, and copped a HUGE attitude towards DH. DH was pissed that his son read something that was not written for his eyes to see...but I guess the BM shared it with the son to show what a 'bastard' the father was. WHATEVER!

This was way before MY involvement with DH, but I do know that this 29 year old stepson of mine still holds that against DH, along with other things that Daddy didn't do--like buy a car for him. The boy expected daddy to buy him a car so he could go out and LOOK for a job. DH told him, "Uh, No...you get to do what *I* did...save up your money and buy your own car."

What's funny is that I would have done the same thing...DH wasn't given things like that--he had to work for them, and I grew up the SAME way. And even MORE ironic is that the BM and MY ex grew up totally opposite to the way my DH and I grew up. Things were handed to the BM and to my ex left and right...they never worked for their things.

~*~A Good Mommy will let the kids lick the beaters. A GREAT Mommy will turn the mixer off first!~*~