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The weekend is over

sassy_half's picture

Submitted by sassy_half on Sun, 01/07/2007 - 8:50pm

I made it through the weekend, barely. Not too many arguments, kids just tried to play us parents against each other. I really hate when they do that. Then on Sat night the kids BM calls, she wants them on Sun around noon, and of course my husband bends over backwards for the witch. So since my husband is at work at this time I have to drop what I am doing to run them to her house cause she can never come get them. Is it normal that my husband bend over backwards for the EX? Sometimes it really bothers me. If he ever wants to have an argument with her it is usually through me. Had to find a babysitter for a couple of hrs this weekend and trust me it is hard finding someone to put up with the SD for even alittle bit. And if I do find someone they ask for an arm and a leg. Sometimes I just feel so torn.

Comments

meshel's picture

Submitted by meshel on Sun, 01/07/2007 - 10:09pm

I used to have to drop what I was doing to run my skids around too. Pick ups, drop off's, babysitting, It even interfeared w/ my work schedule. BM was to drunk to keep a d-license. Then , I figured out, and was also informed that it was not my responsibility, it was the parents responsibility for transporting the kids. So I dont do that anymore, was almost ready to paint my car yellow, & buy a meter. LOL. Also, your husband should not play "beck & call boy" to his EX. It's her way of trying to run/be apart of your lives.Don't be taken advantage of. And try to express your feelings to your husband.

Nymh's picture

Submitted by Nymh on Mon, 01/08/2007 - 6:42am

I don't know how normal this is, but when BM asks BF to have SS home early, he just tells her no. The papers say we have him until 6, so he'll be home at 6. She's tried this several times, and he tells her no every time. There's nothing she can do about it, we're doing what the divorce papers say and the law is on our side. She's even tried to call the police and get them to come out and pick up her son, who also tell her no; just because she wants him home doesn't mean that he has to come home, and we're still not breaking the law regardless of how badly she disagrees.

They're arguing with each other through you? Nonononono...girl, you should seriously consider your place in that argument. Their problems have nothing to do with you and you don't deserve to be placed in the middle. It sounds like you're doing a lot of your DH's dirty work for him. There's no reason for you to me delivering messages to the ex, arguing with her over things HE wants to say, etc. She's not YOUR ex, she's HIS ex...

*~So sayeth Nymh~*

Enuffsenuff's picture

Submitted by Enuffsenuff on Mon, 01/08/2007 - 8:16am

It is BM's way of putting herself into your life. Like I tell my BF--if you continue to bend over backwards for her--she will continue to expect you too. Once he quit letting her rely on him she quit asking him for stuff. She was pissed for awile--but heck that doesn't take much on her end.

I agree with Nymh too--you are not entitled to give up time with skids simply because she wants you too. In fact in my experience doing so only ends up creating problems later--you stray from the visitation order too much and it only creates Chaos. Now that's not to say we don't take skids extra time--we do--BM needs a sitter, can't handle kids she is too depressed etc. But we document it all and we do not offer exchange for those days if they were not planned in advance--it just becomes her loss.