Hope everyone survived the holidays, I think this year was the most stressful so far. Don't believe that whole "once they're 18 the drama is over" crap. So, SD23, her DH(SSIL?) and SGD3 live out of state (SSIL is in the military). A few weeks before XMas, SD called my DH to let him know they would be home for Christmas. Great, right? after all they haven't been home since last XMas. OH, and by the way, she needs him to give her $200 to help pay for her airfare.

DH discusses it with me (SSIL's dad was going to pay SSIls airfare, and SDs half sibs were paying half of SGDs airfare, so SD needed help) and we agreed as a couple that we could afford it. (Credit to DH here for discussing it with me before agreeing, even though it was coming out of "his" account.)

Ok, that hurdle is crossed. Skids were coming for 2 weeks -- since both sets of parents are divorced, there were 4 GPs to see. SD broke the visit into segments, with each GP getting an "event" during their visit (Xmas Eve, Xmas day, SGDs birthday and NYE). Not a bad plan overall, but missing some important elements. Like: transportation! They decided not to rent a car, and everyone had to shuffle them from place to place with very little planning and notice.

The GPs live some distance from each other, about 30 miles between each of them! (well, not counting DHs XW who it turns out is in the process of being evicted -- so instead of staying with her BM, SD went to visit her half bro who lives 75 miles away!)

Still with me?

We were to have Xmas day and the next 4 days as our visit. SD informs us 2 days before that we will need to drive 30 miles and back Xmas morning to pick the 3 of them up from her MIls and bring them back to our house for the visit. DH tells her he will be there early (I joking said 6am to try to avoid traffic) and he gets there about 8 am. I stay home to make a nice breakfast for everyone, and make sure the tree and presents all look nice. When he arrives, keep in mind everyone knows the kids are supposed to spend Xmas with us, SD and her DHs family are sitting around having breakfast together. THEN, they have to open all their presents together. My DH ends up standing there for over an HOUR while they open presents and get ready to leave. Needless to say, he was pretty pissed.

By the time the skids got here, no one wants the nice breakfast I spent 2 hours making, and the SGD is already bored of opening presents. Yay for us.

I had gotten lots of clothes for SGD (cause they told me she needed them, including nice winter wear as they live in major snow country). SSIL inspected the tag of every single item I gave her to check out the brand. Really?!?!

During the visit, SD informed us that since her MIL didn't take them anywhere we needed to take them to the (big city where her MIL lives) Zoo, as well as another (expensive) interactive educational museum place. We had already planned a trip to the zoo (and luckily had some free passes) so that wasn't a big deal, but I wasn't really pleased to be told what I would be paying for them to do. I figured we had spent enough flying them out, xmas presents, and feeding them.

Neither SD or SSIL picked up after themselves or SGD the entire time they were here. Not a plate made it into the kitchen, not a fork rinsed and put in the dishwasher. OH, and my favorite part -- SD went through all my makeup and personal stuff in my bedroom dresser while I was cooking XMas dinner for 15!! How do I know? Because she told me a few days later!! Yep, went into our bedroom, into my stuff, and helped herself to my expensive hair stuff and lotion and makeup, WITHOUT ASKING!! Every time i turned around, she was coming out of my room!

Moving on with the story... I mentioned that SGDs birthday was while the skids were visiting -- SSIL and his dad were in charge of planning and arranging the party as it would be held during his portion of the visit. On the way to the zoo (3 days before the party), SD announces in the car that her FIL has decided to have the party at a restaurant and that SD and SSIL want each GP to pay for a quarter of the party - $85 each. (yep, over $300 in food for a party that we didn't plan or have any control over the guest list.) did I mention that the party was a morning party and would only be serving bagels and coffee??? and that SD invited over 50 people???

DH and I managed to stay calm, but DH later informed SD he didn't appreciate being informed he was paying for 1/4 of a party he had no control over, (the only people from DHs family going were me and him), and if it was such a money issue he would solve the problem by not attending.

anyway, skids are pissed cuz DH said he wouldn't go, DH is pissed at the entitlement he's seeing (his words!), and Skids tell DH & I that they have decided that it's in SGDs best interests for all of her GPs to suck it up, get along, and celebrate her birthday together. WHATEVER.

drama, drama, drama...Let's look at the GPs: there's SSILs mom and dad who are divorced -- they dislike each other. the mom is a..well, not a nice word, who hates my SD and wants the apron strings back around her boy. Did I mention that her BF she lives with is married to her cousin? the dad is a weirdo who tried to convince the skids 3 years ago that he could get them a loan to buy a house (he was a loan broker) even though they had part time jobs, poor credit, etc. DH & I really dislike the mom, and tolerate the dad.

Then, let's not forget our BM in all of this. turns out she's in the middle of being evicted, as in that's why my SS21 has moved in with us. She's a whole lot ghetto and unpredictable to start with, now SS will be arriving with us and in her mind is abandoning her and being a traitor by living with his dad.

FUN mix of people, Right? After lots of discussion, we attended the party, and DH paid for us. It was a pretty awkward party, no one spoke much. The tension was amazing, I've never been somewhere that the energy you felt upon entering the room made your chest tighten. crazy. I think next time we'll stay home.

Anyway, I think that's most of the visit. If you made it this far, thanks for listening to my spewing of frustration. Thank goodness they left today to go home, and I don't have to wonder what thing I'll be informed I'm paying for next.