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Working from home. Watching SKid!!! No Way!

steplife's picture

Submitted by steplife on Wed, 04/16/2014 - 1:39pm

I work at home and DH was talking about how it's nice that I'll be able to watch SD7 on his weeks this summer! WHAT?! I don't think so. I told him that he needs to sign her up for camp or find a babysitter on those days.

DH: "SD is gonna be so mad, that's going to suck for her having to wake up early and go to a program all summer. And I'm going to have to drop her off and pick her up, its really inconvenient!"

Umm how does camp with a bunch of other kids to play with suck? Oh because SD won't get to sit in front of TV all summer and God forbid be forced into outside physical activities!

DH: "I don't understand why you won't help me, why don't you like SD?" aka YOU HATE MY KID!

I can't really work much while she's here. BECAUSE.....
SD: "I'm hungry, can I watch tv, I don't like this show can you change it, I don't know where my pink shoe is, I need a snack, is it lunch time, can I go outside, have you seen my markers , when is my dad coming home, can I have another snack, etc, etc, etc. "

AAAAANNND DH then says, "Well if I'm gonna have to pay a babysitter this summer then I'll need you to start paying a little more towards our bills" WHAT THE F**K?!

I am NOT responsible for extra payments because you can't afford a babysitter.

Shoot me now!

Comments

godess-clueless's picture

Submitted by godess-clueless on Wed, 04/16/2014 - 1:43pm

If you work at home----that is your job. Suggest DH take his child to his job when he leaves every morning.

moeilijk's picture

Submitted by moeilijk on Wed, 04/16/2014 - 1:43pm

If he can't afford child-care, then why wouldn't he be taking her to HIS work? She's HIS kid, so HIS income can be affected by having to try to simultaneously work and supervise. But nice try on the guilt-trip followed up with an attack on the pocket-book. SMH.

twopines's picture

Submitted by twopines on Wed, 04/16/2014 - 1:49pm

^^Exactly^^

Guilt trip followed by "well then you have to..." So silly.

GhostWhoCooksDinner's picture

Submitted by GhostWhoCooksDinner on Wed, 04/16/2014 - 1:46pm

Not your kid, not your problem. Let her PARENTS figure out child care.

twopines's picture

Submitted by twopines on Wed, 04/16/2014 - 1:51pm

So if he can't afford a babysitter, what would he have done if he didn't think he had you to fall back on? Let the kid run feral? Ridiculous.

oneoffour's picture

Submitted by oneoffour on Wed, 04/16/2014 - 1:51pm

"Honey, I don't hate your daughter. But I WORK from home. If you cannot take her to your work and supervise her, why should I? This pays my share of the bills. If you cannot afford summer camp for her, this is not my problem. This is up to you and her mother to sort out. I am not her mother, I do not hate her. And I am not telling you how to solve your problem. If I wasn't here, what other options would you have during summer?"

askYOURdad's picture

Submitted by askYOURdad on Mon, 04/21/2014 - 9:16am

I like the advice above about just asking him if he would be able to take skid to work with him.

Also, the part about "it will be inconvenient" are you FREAKING KIDDING ME? It's YOUR child, welcome to parenting, where have you been?

Jsmom's picture

Submitted by Jsmom on Wed, 04/16/2014 - 2:11pm

If bills are split 50/50, this is not your problem to compensate him for his child. I work from home and it is convenient with the SS. But, I will not entertain him and if it is a problem, DH found other arrangements. Thankfully, he is 15 now and stay away and understands that I am on the phone.

zerostepdrama's picture

Submitted by zerostepdrama on Wed, 04/16/2014 - 2:15pm

Your DH is an ass. I dont have anything to add that someone else didnt already post about. But I totally get where you are coming from.

hereiam's picture

Submitted by hereiam on Wed, 04/16/2014 - 2:39pm

"I'm sorry that your daughter is an inconvenience for you and an added expense, but you should have thought about that about 8 years ago. It's not up to me to make it more convenient for you or to ease the financial burden. I trust you will work this out."

Then give him a kiss and go on about your business.

steplife's picture

Submitted by steplife on Wed, 04/16/2014 - 2:49pm

Thanks for all the replies!!!

It's very frustrating!! I did tell him why don't you take her to work if it's so easy.

I am going back to school to get an outside of the home job, so I won't be working from home anymore after the summer.

It blows my mind that he thinks my income should offset costs for HIS kid's summer care.

Once we have kids we want me to be a SAHM and I won't mind watching SD since he will be contributing 100% of finances toward our family. I won't be on conference calls and balancing important financial documents that I need to focus on. I can focus on the kids.

I don't get why people think working from home is not actual WORK either. If anything I feel like I have to be more disciplined than when going to an office!

Then after all the back and forth DH sees my point and is looking into summer options. I just HATE how it has to turn into freaking war to get him to realize he is her PARENT and responsible for this kind of crap, not me! Financially or otherwise!!

And I'm sure he's still gonna be grumpy about it though! Ugh

Steppenwolf's picture

Submitted by Steppenwolf on Mon, 06/09/2014 - 4:22pm

Wow, this hits the nail on the head for me exactly. I've owned my own business for the past five years and prior to moving in w/my fiance and her two boys SS8 & SS10 I LOVED working from home, I mean who wouldn't? The past couple of years since I moved in with them however, I've grown to loathe it and now that summer is upon us things have only gotten worse.

I've told her boys time and time again not to interrupt me while I'm working and to no avail whatsoever, they just burst in time and time again no matter how mad I get. A few times I've been on the phone with a client and they've burst in crying, yelling, etc.

Told my fiance that I can't take it anymore and she tells me, "well, if YOU want to pay for them to go to camp, I'd be happy to take them". We're not even married for Chris'sake and she expects me to treat them as if they were my own kids.

And to make matters worse she's told me a few times that she never wanted to have kids with her now deceased husband and often laments being a mother and it's quite clear in her behavior: she quit her full time job and spends much of her time in bed, doesn't clean or do laundry for either herself and her boys, yet complains that nothing ever gets done.

Aye, aye, aye, at any rate, it seems the response from folks here is universal that the parent should be taking care of their children and not expect the significant other/spouse to do it. Perhaps because I'm super susceptible to guilt, it's been hard for me to bend my mind around this, but clearly everyone here is in support of the original poster, myself included, so I guess I'm not crazy after all. They're not MY kids.