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Another Fabulous Night.. NOT.. (((RANTING HERE)))

stepmomsoon's picture

Wasn’t my evening fun?

Dinner – SK12 starts bitching that his tomato soup was too hot. Now bear in mind, he was served first and for the love of GOD – it’s SOUP! Take a spoonful and blow on it.. wow.. it cools down! I had almost finished my soup and it wasn’t that hot, my daughter was eating hers and she is usually the one that says things are too hot.. so, he was just being a jerk because he wanted to get up and play video games with his friend who we were watching and who wasn’t eating.

He literally throws a damn fit and tries to argue his way out of it.. tells his father he is “not waiting for it to cool down” and it gets to the point where DH tells him he has to go sit on the step… only for him to get up and tell DH “this is stupid, I have company and am not sitting on the step” – but at least he eats his friggen soup now..

It is so hard to not just snap on this kid as these little disruptions are constant with him.. he is the biggest pain in the ass and I am so fed up because DH does so little to modify his behaviors. That’s another story for another day. Same battle we all have, I suppose.

Then later.. DH, my daughter and I are sitting in the main room watching TV. Something my daughter and I seldom get the chance to do because the two SS’s (12&15) usually take over this or both TV rooms.. so her and I usually have to go upstairs to the master bedroom to watch TV – it’s quieter anyways, so we don’t mind. Trying to watch TV with those two is annoying because they feel the need to comment on everything and talk back and forth loudly about it.. then you can’t hear.. so they have to replay it and you end up spending an hour watching a 30 minute show because of this.

Anyways.. SS15 is using this time to play on the PS3 in the other TV room. After his time is up, he turns on a show to watch in that room. SS12 was in the shower and comes down and begins to throw a FIT because he WANTS to watch the Bachelor and can’t because there isn’t a TV for him and then DEMANDS we tell SS15 to turn it on. WTF? He is acting like everyone in the house is out to get him and it’s some kind of a friggen conspiracy to keep him from watching his show (which by the way, we DVR it every week – so it’s not like he can’t ever watch it).. this royal hissy fit is complete with deep breathing like he is trying so hard to control himself and growling..

How he is handling himself is unacceptable and ruining everyone’s evening now – this is his usual tactic. SS12 doesn’t get his way he will be damned if anyone else enjoys their time if he’s around.

It’s 8:10 and I was planning on going upstairs at 8:30 with my daughter anyways – we spend the last part of every night before bedtime reading. (Just a side note for what’s happening next)

SK12 then says “I’m going upstairs to watch TV in your room” to DH – like this is an option. No. It is not. But now apparently he thinks it is because my daughter and I go up there to have some peace. And it’s not like she just decides to go up there and chill in our bed – it’s with me to get away from THEM because they are annoying and loud.

Not to mention there have been so many times where DH is in the master bedroom (doing work or whatever), both SS’s have both TVs downstairs occupied and my daughter has no place to go at all – just her room. Does she throw a royal hissy fit and do this crap. Nope – and she is younger than SS12.

Plus – really.. I don’t want them in my bed. Being 1000% honest here. SS12 picks at his toes and rubs his nose constantly and refuses to wear a shirt. SS15 bites his toenails and fingernails and spits them wherever he is sitting. No thank you, not in my bed. Of course, I keep this to myself.

So I look at the clock and am like “let’s go upstairs now to read” to my daughter. She agrees because I’m sure, like me, she is annoyed and wants away from this drama.. So I say to SS12 “you can have the TV, we are going upstairs”

20 minutes later I walk out of my daughters room to go talk to DH about something – he is in the master watching TV and I overhear the SS’s downstairs bitching about what happened.. SS12 says something about not “being allowed to watch TV in their bedroom” and SS15 says “it’s like you have AIDS or something” – both in snarky ways.. OMG – really. SS15 is a total instigator and trying to make this into something it isn’t.

I go in and tell DH about this because quite frankly this is just another example of them thinking they are entitled to something – MY BEDROOM. These kids take over every room in the house.. this is the only place I have peace. This is the only place my daughter and I can comfortably read a book or watch TV together. This is the only place where their shit isn’t scattered all over the place. They are not entitled to my bedroom and it was not even about SS12 not being allowed in the master – it was about his attitude towards the entire house and how he thought he could just kick people off TV’s!

Sooooo pissed off. DH calls them up and rips SS15 a new one for being an instigator and butting into a situation that wasn’t his business. Then they start up about how my daughter watches TV in there with me.. DH tells them it’s because her and I have no other place to go because they hog all the other TV’s and that she doesn’t just go in there by herself – there are shows they (meaning my daughter and I) like to watch, that they know you don’t like to watch, so they are polite and go up there and give you guys the TV.

I mean WTF.. am I seeing this wrong? Is it just me or do these kids have issues with thinking that they have a right to everything?

Its with everything.. they think the world owes them shit all the time!

Comments

GhostWhoCooksDinner's picture

I can't get past the part where a 12-year-old can't figure out to blow on hot soup. :?

stepmomsoon's picture

lol.. yea, that and he takes 5 minutes to tie his freaking shoes and asks daddy to do it because "he's better at it".. welcome to my hell, peeps

FTMandSM's picture

I hate TV arguements. I personally want to throw the TV out of the window when they start. SD is 3 and SO wants to get her a TV of her own. When she starts whining cause her cartoons aren't on or he changes the channel when she leaves the room. I either get up and leave or say fine, no TV for anyone. If you can't play nice, then you can't play at all. It's just such a silly argument. But I get how you don't want 2 younger boys in your rooms. They sound kinda gross. Hell, I don't want SD in our room. She usually gets into things that she shouldn't. Especially if you aren't in there with them.

stepmomsoon's picture

It wasn't even "his company" - we are helping out a neighbor who is going thru a divorce and needs some child care..

I agree and believe me.. I wanted to crack him

stepmomsoon's picture

I am in the same position as most step moms.. a position of very limited power and limited ability to hand out consequences.

If her were my kid, he would regret acting like this because his life would be hell until he stopped. Unfortunately, he is 12 and been allowed to behave in this manner all his life.

lillfiredog's picture

Ewwwww! No, I would not want SS's in my room! My DD comes in my room to sit on the bed and chat. But I have heard the toilet flush and not heard any handwashing, seen and smelled thier rooms and just no, it is your space. Can at least one spot be sacred? I am with you, keep them out of your room. Remind them that is the room you guys are intimate in, maybe they would be too grossed out LOL!

stepmomsoon's picture

I do what I can, when I can.

Like I stated before, I am in the same boat as most step moms - my authority is limited. If I were to do what I thought was the right thing to do, DH would deem it to be "too mean" or "severe" - a fight would ensue and I would be undermined/the bad guy. It is not worth it.

zerostepdrama's picture

These boys defintely have too much say in things. If my BS and even my SS acted like this DH would light a fire under their asses so fast.

Teenage girls can be real bitches and have smart mouths and it sucks. But there is something about a teenage boy acting this way that really grinds my nerves. Because this is how they are going to grow up and treat their future SOs. They are learning to think this is okay and it's okay to talk to people like that.

Not to mention the fact that the 12 year old is whining and acting like a 3 year old.

stepmomsoon's picture

My DH is the king of inconsistency.. one day he will get on him (not to the point I think he should), the next he lets everything slide because he is too lazy to parent.

Both my ss's are assholes and talk to their dad like shit. I have had soooo many conversations about this exact topic, DH will agree it's wrong and when it comes time to bust their asses with constant reminders this will not be tolerated.. nothing.

I can only enforce my boundaries and if they talk to me like this, they pay the price. I do go after them and I do put them in their place as much as I can. But.. it is limited: for example, ss12 mouths off, yells or tells me no - I want to remove all his shit (electronics) for that day and he does not get it back until he proves he deserves it with good behavior.

DH.. that is too harsh and you can't double up punishments or make them long. WTF? If this kid is an asshat at 7pm and we take away his precious ipod until bedtime - that's 2 hours! Seriously.. he doesn't care and has the ipad and the ps3 to go to next.
That is not punishment.

misSTEP's picture

So maybe (bring on the flaming) since he can't bring himself to be a proper dad, you might need to take time out from being the proper wife! If you know what I mean.