I've read it, StepUltimate, and was horrified, yet again, at the lengths that BMs will go to shut out their children’s fathers. With guidance from my mother, I neither refused my second ex-husband free access to his son nor spoke negatively about him in front of the boy. My mother was a wise and tolerant woman, to whom I owe most of the better angels of my nature.

 A woman who arranges the murder of her children’s dad, rather than arrive at a reasonable custody arrangement is, in my opinion, a pitiless narcissist. Unless the other parent is completely unfit and dangerous to his/her child, he/she must be allowed to contribute to the child’s upbringing.

In my own childhood, I suffered the loss of my father very deeply. He was both a gambler and an alcoholic who deserted my mom when I and my siblings were very young. He later remarried, started a new family and made no attempt to stay in touch with his former children nor did he provide a penny of child support.

Back in the mid ‘50s, when most kids had a mom and a dad, I felt less than in many ways. Despite my father’s desertion, my mother always spoke well of him.

Toxic, high-conflict, PASing BMs whose hatred for their ex-husbands exceed the needs of their shared bios, fill me such disgust that I long for karma to dole out the punishment that they so richly deserve.

Markel’s ex-wife should be spending the rest of her evil life in jail!

Upon occasion I question if my cut and dry "if they suck, end it" perspective might be a bit dangerous for those I am giving my opinion to and for me.  

Though I balk to ever advise that anyone stay in a toxic situation with a toxic failed partner.

In the case of Dan's kids,  the kids need to be with Dan's parents.  Period. Dot.  IMHO the odds that the XW had zero to do with it, are slim and none.  Shit... begets shit. Even if the second generation shit is a lawyer.  Odds are, since the brother and the mother are shit.... Ta Da!

IMHO of course.

I remember one case where a father was ambushed because he went into the BM's house to pick up his kids... something I put an end to Chef doing in the early years.  In the early years the Girhippo who is Amazonian, not in a physically fit way but just in sheer size and heft,  literally attacked Chef and started punching his head.  He did not retaliate.   

And again, there is no limit to the depths these HCGUBMs will sink to to get their way.  Murder, also not resorted to that frequently is just another PAS tool in their arsenal.

Very sorry for your loss, StepUltimate, ((Hugs))

No normal person,, who doesn't want to spend 20 years in jail will not do something like this 

On youtube.  I made comparisons between this case and how enmeshed the Girhippo and Battleaxe Galactica were in front of Chef...that they were likely to bump him off had he not acquiesed.  Of course Chef didn't like it.

You've got it good Chef and should be grateful for good ol' Thinkthrice, but NO.

The Shanna Gardner/Jared Bridegan case - currently in the early stages in FL courts - is similar. Hitmen were hired to take out dad presumably so mom can have sole custody. Now the kids have no father and a mother in jail, and the mother (and now her parents) won't allow the children to see their paternal family, including 2 young half siblings. 

I'm glad this case is getting so much coverage. The more light shined on cases where fathers are victimized simply for wanting to be in their kids' lives the better, and the sooner change will come.

Check out the documentary I Stand With John.

Barring any mitigating information, the murder's family should never get the kids. The kids should by default go to the victim's family. Parents who raise a murderer, and the sibs of the murderer, are far more likely than not... shit. 

Judgmental?  Absolutely.

Kids deserve better than that.