You are here

SD driving me insane!!!! Need help!

stressed_out_momma's picture

Submitted by stressed_out_momma on Thu, 11/12/2009 - 1:35am

My DH and I have been married for only 5 mos. I have 3 wonderful kids and he has 2 children of his own. We have been living together for almost a year now, but the jealousy between our two youngest daughters is getting out of control. His is 6 years old and mine is 4. The most recent fight has been one over the SD's birthday party coming up soon. She has told my daughter that she cannot come to her party because she doesn't like her. I know it is childish for me to get involved, but it is hard for me to see my baby get her feelings hurt... This is not the first time the SD has made this comment, it has been going on for over a month now, and the BM reinforces this to SD. What should I do?

Comments

herewegoagain's picture

Submitted by herewegoagain on Thu, 11/12/2009 - 2:42am

I do NOT think it is childish for you to get involved. It us up to us as parents to correct children when they are hurtful towards others. She might be 6, but if you do not interfere and tell her to apologize and that what she is doing is wrong, in 4 more years she'll be doing the same thing...and in another 8, the same thing...then everyone will say it's too late to "fix" her...

I would tell her to apologize, that she's not being nice and that she wouldn't like it if your daughter told her she wasn't coming to her party or getting her a gift because she didn't like her...

Storm76's picture

Submitted by Storm76 on Thu, 11/12/2009 - 5:14am

What does your DH say about this? I'm assuming that your kids live with you but the skids don't, so if the BM is organising the party it's going to be difficult to get your daughter invited.

Trying to think of things from SD6's point of view, there's a couple of issues she may be having that strike me initially:

- She was the baby of the family, but there is now a younger child so isn't sure of 'her position' any more
- She is likely to be jealous that your kids get to see her dad everyday, whilst she doesn't
- If her older sibling gets on well with your kids she may feel pushed out when they're all at your house

Bringing 5 kids together from 2 different families is always going to be tough, so perhaps you & DH need to plan some activities to hopefully bring all the kids together, something that can only be done with having that many - I'm thinking team games (boys vs girls rather than in 'original families') or a tapas style dinner where everyone gets to choose a favourite dish to make & share.