You are here

Quick Question

TBabygrl1's picture

Submitted by TBabygrl1 on Wed, 03/28/2012 - 10:23pm

Ok what does everyone think. My fiance wants to make fake facebook page in order to befriend his ex in order to find out what is going on with the kids since she is not telling him ANYTHING as ordered by the court. Do you think it is a good idea or bad? If you have done it was it a good idea or would you do it again?

Comments

bi's picture

Submitted by bi on Wed, 03/28/2012 - 10:27pm

bad idea. using fb for spying purposes will only stress you both out and nothing good will come of it. it's just another oppurtunity for her to cause trouble. if he wants to know what is court ordered, he should call the court. it's his information too, there's no reason for them to keep it from him. i would never go thru my ex to find out anything, i go straight to the source.

oneoffour's picture

Submitted by oneoffour on Wed, 03/28/2012 - 10:31pm

I agree. 2 wrongs don't make a right in this case. It may make things happen faster but she can go back and say you are spying on her. And yes, stressing you out when you find out her skanky ways will only cause problems because you will not be able to do anything about it.
Go thru the courts and drag her arse back there over and over until she gets the message.

giveitago's picture

Submitted by giveitago on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 3:38am

I agree...very bad idea. This woman could become totally unhinged when, not if, she finds out. I'd be talking to the courts on this one.

asheeha's picture

Submitted by asheeha on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 9:25am

I know it stinks but your fiance is going to have to just step it up. BM RARELY and at one point NEVER told DH what was going on. If the school changes the parent teacher conference times we won't find out until after, we missed sd8's kindergarten graduation because BM never told dh...dh found out from another parent how beautiful sd8 looked as the mini prom queen...could go on and on about what we've missed.

It's so maddening. But DH just had to step it up and get to know the teachers, even to the point of bugging them. He also never received any information on their report cards. So he had to know his rights and let the school know that he wanted them to send him a copy of the report cards. He also knows where his kids are going to the doctor and calls them on occasion to find out what is going on. Also, get to know the school secretary and have her set aside a copy of the school postings. He or you can pick them up once a week.

It's a hassle...no doubt. But if he wants to be informed he's going to have to take action and get informed. Legally he has access to ALL the kids education and medical records...nobody can keep that from him regardless of who has custody. It's his parental right!

Also, he wouldn't know anything about the kids extra curricular if he didn't demand to have the coaches number before he paid anything. That way he is able to get on the call list and find out when practices and games are. He also tries to pay the teams directly, instead of going through BM. He makes a concerted effort to be an involved dad! This has saved him COUNTLESS times...but it was really hard in the beginning.