Introducing myself

Hi all,

I'm Tobin from Auckland, New Zealand.
I'm a mum. I'm a BM as you guys call it. I'm a wife, an ex, a daughter, a stepdaughter. So I have a lot of stories to share, and a few things I've always wondered which maybe I can share and get some answers about.
Hopefully I can add to the discussion. I've been lurking and love the honesty here, and the genuine caring of the community.
I'm not American, but my step dad (if you can call him that) is. Hopefully I can inject some perspective of the way things are done down here

Thanks!

TobinNZ's blog
Log in or register to post comments

Comments

Hi!! Maybe your stepdad can

Hi!! Maybe your stepdad can help me out. How do I get FDH to get over being sensitive about SD6's behavior and start doing something about it? How do I point out her bullying of my BD2 to him w/o him feeling like its a personal attack? How do I get him to be consistent in enforcing rules and consequences? This kid is not his perfect darling angel like he thinks. She is disrespectful and downright mean but he doesn't seem to want to face it. Put my head down and run? lol

In all seriousness...welcome!! lol

Haha. Thank you Tough one

Haha. Thank you

Tough one on the defensive DH topic. Seems to be a recurring theme around here.
Some sort of objective observation from a 3rd party? Filming events?
If we could solve this we could be millionaire self help authors for step families!

Hi outtahere. Yeah , I may

Hi outtahere. Yeah , I may be a BM but I think many of the SMS here are also BMs? Why would I be at odds?
I've been reading for a few days and a lot of what many SMS say here seem to be very fair! I like the common sense advice.
A great many lessons to learn about how to not be a dickhead BM too, am I right?

About "down here": Just different laws n things. Sometimes it's interesting to see how cultures can differ, across oceans, across state lines, across fences!. Just like how my family is different to my neighbours - there are still things we can learn from others approaches. That I can learn from the people,here too.

Haha! Nah, I think these SMs

Haha! Nah, I think these SMs are awesome
I've noticed the truth hurts with some here, even some SMs. When it's right in their face but nooooooo.......

I tell you, my daughter has a SM. best thing my ex ever did was marry her. She was only 2 at the time, a baby away from her mum with a dude who had never watched her once while we were together, no nappy changes, feedings.... He couldn't look after a kid to save himself. Thank The Lord for her SM, I was able to sleep at night knowing she is now fed properly, loved, made to do chores, read to, clean! I know she didn't have to, not her kid, but she does. DD is 10 now and they are very close. We go watch her events together. I like her, I'm grateful for her. She's an honourable woman. Just bad taste in men hopefully he grows up and is more use if they ever have babies. He still is out every night leaving them alone though.... Unreliable and uninterested. Of course, that's "not my DH, not my problem," haha!
Wonderful lady. You have helped me appreciate her more by reading your stories.
Also, I'm aware that I need to make sure DD continues to be kind and obedient to her SM when she hits those teens!