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How do you document PAS for court?

smnikki's picture

Submitted by smnikki on Fri, 08/21/2009 - 12:15pm

bm is going to court for full custody, and cs...of course! anyways, among all of her hearsay superficial nonsense she wrote in her statement, she is now brainwashing and PASing the hell out of my step son. On Wednesday ss did not even want to go to his moms, but said he wanted to stay with us for a looooooooooooong time. But today when dh talked to ss he asked to stay with his mom tonight, on our night, when dh said no he got very emotional and threw a fit. bm very fakely tried to tell ss he should see his dad...

My question is, How do we document this? Do we just tell the judge that we feel ss is suffering from pas from his mother and that we want an evaluation. OR do we list out in detail the date/time/ and what happened that we think is because of the things bm is telling him?

lol, or both?

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imagr8tma's picture

Submitted by imagr8tma on Fri, 08/21/2009 - 12:29pm

PAS and have it heard in court. I would start a file and keep dates, time, information, text, emails etc....

We are in the same boat - BM has filed an affidavit and motion for taking custody from DH, ending visitation and more child support. SD is a also a victim of repeated PAS tatics.

Only difference for us is that BM likes to document things and do things and then leave behind a paper trail. Which really makes it easy for us in court.

DH has joint custody and every other weekend visits, etc....

But BM has signed letters at daycare facilities blocking his picking up or visiting child - the same morning the court awarded him joint custody and pick ups at the day care...

She wrote letters and had them notarized about medications (wrong dosage) filed false protective orders same day of court to have DH not get christmas visit as soom as the permanent hearing was complete - time stamped 17 minutes after court.

etc..... we have three binders of things from BM over 6 years and she just keeps right on doing crazy stuff. In our case we don't really have to do much - but by not arguing and fussing with her or letter her know we are keeping records of her actions - she feels really comfortable to keep on acting stupid/hateful/irrational.

Keep good records, notes and pray it will be heard in court.

********She doesn't have to love me or even like me - it doesn't change a dang thing..... So get over it and move on BM!************

Sia's picture

Submitted by Sia on Fri, 08/21/2009 - 12:53pm

IMagr8...... document EVERYTHING! Keep a journal on your thoughts, as well. A journal I kept helped us win custody when BM went to the mental hospital. Yes, they were going to let her keep custody from a psych ward! CRAZY

Plus, give your attorney a copy of the PAS book and demand he/she read it before you allow them to represent you! Try to find an atty who specializes in PAS.

imagr8tma's picture

Submitted by imagr8tma on Fri, 08/21/2009 - 2:00pm

you can google it and some websites do a good job explaining what it is.....

In my own words - it is one of the parents tries any method they can find to attempt to alienate the other parent from having a positive relationship with the child or children between them

********She doesn't have to love me or even like me - it doesn't change a dang thing..... So get over it and move on BM!************

Anon2009's picture

Submitted by Anon2009 on Fri, 08/21/2009 - 2:14pm

Record EVERY episode relating to SS, BM and PAS.

Print out a lot of PAS information from the Internet and write a detailed description on what kind of alienator BM is and use lots of specific examples.

I agree with Sia- find an attorney who specializes in PAS. We did and it made a world of difference.

lovelovelove's picture

Submitted by lovelovelove on Fri, 08/21/2009 - 2:14pm

And he said that it is VERY difficult to prove PAS and it involves tons of documentation, evaluations of BM, the kids and everyone involved. He also said that even with all of that, most people still can't prove it and the case is thrown out.

The BM in our situation is a psychotic monster, an in the closet lesbian, and adulteress (sex with women), encourages the SD's 12 and 15 to shower together AND bad-mouths/brainwashes the girls against DH and I on a daily basis...and we STILL can't prove the PAS in court.

Even when we told the attorney ALL of that stuff, he said we would still have trouble getting full custody of the kids because BM is the mother and judges always prefer that the kids stay with the BM's.

F-ed up, I know....but the courts are in favor of their crazy asses for whatever reason.

Good luck to you!

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